#and i'm like 'the media wants us to be like this and divide us' | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

ybklix · 10 months ago

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𝐬𝐨𝐟𝐭 𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦

★ pairing: neighbor!chan x fem!reader

✦summary: You have a new life, in your dream apartment in the big city, your life is quiet, but suddenly your incredibly handsome neighbor across the door, Chan, decides to take you out of your comfort zone, you can't get him out of your head and you really plan to do something about it.

✭ genre - warnings: MDNI 18+, smut, fluff, fingering, masturbation, dry humping, oral sex, unprotected sex, creampie, videotape, cunnilingus, use of nicknames, slight dirty talk, aftercare.

word count: 7.7k

╰ ⋆⭒˚.⋆ masterlist - taglist forms

୧ ‧₊˚request by anon₊ ˚⊹♡

divider by qqmariztwsse

You admired the place, happy, the movers did all their work, now you only had to unpack and arrange your new apartment, you had been dreaming of moving to a bigger and different city for a year now, you talked to your parents and siblings just for emotional support, and there they all were now. Your mother, your sister and brother, who were going to spend the first night with you.

The four of them decided to walk around the city for a while, eating and enjoying all the scenery and endless places you could just walk and walk to. You arrived late and exhausted to your new apartment, where only your sister wanted to stay one more night, your mother and brother had to go back to your hometown, where they all still lived, where you previously lived already alone as well.

“I'm going to be fine” you said to your mother as you felt her hug you tighter as you said goodbye, her big breasts crushing yours.

“Oh I know dear but now I have to catch a flight to see you, I'm not used to it” your mother said, in a high pitched tone as she pulled away from you.

No matter what, you would always be her baby, you were the youngest among your siblings, of which you had a very cute and close relationship with. You were always a bit overprotected being the youngest, you openly talk about things that cause you anxiety and you are a bit sensitive although you never express it as such, you like to make jokes and be sarcastic about it, you have a personality… quiet and quite relatable to others, that's why you create content videos on Youtube, mainly there you started, but you are in all your social media and you are something like a microcelebrity. That's why you could afford to live in the city of your dreams, in the apartment of your dreams and you were grateful.

Your mother and brother left, boarding that plane and you and your sister returned to your apartment where she kindly helped you unpack.

“I'll go check to see if I have my own mail space yet” you notified your sister, to which she shouted from afar okaaay.

And you walked out of your apartment, where as you crossed the hallway to the front, you found a male silhouette about to enter his apartment, for some reason you stopped a little to see him, wearing a suit with his jacket in his hand and his white button up shirt rolled up in his strong arms, he was handsome, you thought. He turned to see you too, smiled at you realizing you were his new neighbor and whispered kindly:

“Hi.”

His voice was thick and attractive, his appearance masculine, you suddenly felt in some type of way….

“Hi” you replied kindly smiling.

And before he could say anything else, you hurried your step to the end of the corridor, leaving. You didn't know how to react, you didn't expect to find a handsome man in front of your door while you were messily unpacking your entire apartment. He let out a chuckle when he saw your reaction but you didn't hear it.

[…]

“Agh, Y/N, I forgot my cell phone on the counter,” your sister said, already in the hallway, with her things ready to grab the cab downstairs to accompany her to the airport.

You rolled your eyes, looking for her phone but it wasn't where she had indicated, you got frustrated, the cab was waiting for you, and angrily said to her,

“Where is it? It's not here!”

But you received no answer, your sister ran into your neighbor across the hall, who was about to go out to do some shopping, she instantly smiled at him seeing that he was also handsome and your neighbor was as enchanted with your sister as he was with you. You on the other hand went to the bathroom, where your sister had previously been, finding her phone.

“We have to go now…” you said, locking your apartment and you were perplexed to see your handsome neighbor again.

He smiled downward at you, pressing his lips together, he had to admit that you were both pretty, but there was something about you that caught his attention more.

“He tells me you haven't introduced yourself” your sister spoke, looking down at the broad shouldered build of your neighbor and then back up at you.

“Well, I also just arrived recently for work. I'm Bang Chan, your neighbor” he let out a nervous chuckle, causing you to shiver, a good shiver.

You stared at him and greeted him with waving your hand, telling him your name followed by, nice to meet you.

“I think, you were about to leave so, I see you around” he said again.

You nodded and left with your sister, who was dying to talk and didn't until you got in the cab.

“Oh my god, he's really hot, you should go after him, if he doesn't have a girlfriend of course” your sister commented animatedly.

“Stop saying bullshit please” you replied, unwilling to continue the conversation.

The point was… you had never dated before, you were too picky and your love life was non-existent, but you liked being that way, staying at home with your cats, you even made money from complaining about how there is no one to get your attention, expressing it in your videos where thousands of girls around the world found you so real for speaking your truth. You just made your silly little vlog videos or anything creative you could think of, at the moment you were working on filming your move.

Your sister left, you stayed around the city until it got dark and you returned to your new home, you had to feed your cats and clean their litter, but to your surprise, you once again found Chan taking the elevator at the same time. He smiled tenderly at you as you both were about to press the button, he let you do it and you waited, until you both got in alone.

“I guess we're always going to bump into each other now” he said again with his typical soft chuckle.

“Yeah, well, same building, same floor” you said nervously, really with zero idea what to say.

“Did you move into the building or in the city in general?” he asked, so curious to hear from you.

“From the city” you answered, looking straight ahead and only occasionally glancing at him out of the corner of your eye.

The elevator doors opened, he let you out first and you stepped into your hallway.

“Well, if you need someone to show you around the city or help in any address, you know I'm in front of your door” he said, sweetly but something about his voice sounded so inviting, the way he spoke and that the vein in his neck stood out a little.

“Thank you” you told him shyly and walked into your apartment.

You couldn't help but smile… after so long you thought to yourself if, a crush, a fling of whatever with your hot neighbor would be worth it.

[…]

All the rest of the night you unpacked everything, almost finishing your apartment, you were tired but it was a nice spring day that you didn't decide to waste, so you went out to walk for a while, feel the sun on your skin, and feel again the minimal realization that there is a civilization outside, since last night you haven't stopped thinking about Chan, you even imagined how his apartment would be decorated by the way he was dressed, simple and in black. You imagined so many things, even his age, what zodiac sign he might be, everything. You hadn't felt this way about someone in a long time.

And, still in his apartment, Chan's younger sister put him in charge of taking care of the family dog, since no one would be home and she took advantage of the fact that her brother would be staying in the city for his job, so she left her with him. Chan greeted and petted the dog with affection and wanted to take her for a walk.

You arrived at the park near the block from the building and craved an ice cream, you felt the presence of more people but didn't take any notice, until when you asked, a familiar voice appeared behind you, sounding so sonorous that it rumbled your insides.

“Make it two, please” said that voice, you turned to see him.

It was Chan, you smiled at him, his skin glowed brighter as he wore all black and you noticed he had a cute dog on a leash, you honestly thought you saw it coming, he looked like an energetic guy who liked dogs more, you enjoyed the company of cats more, but you forgave him anything.

You quickly confirmed to the guy that it would be two ice creams so that he would take Chan's order as well. And, as he handed over the ice creams, he hurried to say.

“Can you hold them please, I'll pay” he said quickly, extending the money to the employee.

You couldn't even deny it when the clerk was already ready to give him the change when Chan said again, “Leave it like that, thank you.”

You walked a few steps from the ice cream cart, narrowing your eyes because you were bothered by the sun, still watching him, licked from your ice cream before it melted and said in a happy tone, “Thank you.”

“Oh it's nothing, it's just ice cream.”

“We meet again” you repeated amused, this time more relaxed and less shy.

“Yeah, well, same park near the building” he said, with a smile responding the same way you did last night.

You smiled back at him as you continued eating from your ice cream, as sweet, soft and refreshing as Chan's unexpected arrival, he looked like a cute guy.

“You have a dog?” you said to him, this time cooperating so that he picked up on the signals that you wanted to talk to him.

He looked at Berry, his little dog.

“Ahh yes, she's Berry, she's family, she doesn't live in my apartment but my sister let me borrow her to take care of her today.”

Uh, he has a sister, must be nice guy, you thought.

“I have two cats” you blurted out suddenly, blushing as you felt his gaze after he's seen the dog, “Their names are Edward and Lorelai. Berry is, a very cute dog” you said again, nervous.

You bent down to stroke his soft dog's fur with your free hand and stood up again.

Chan laughed, watching you, finding you incredibly adorable and began to walk slowly as you followed, “Edward and Lorelai?” asked Chan with a smile at hearing such names for cats.

“For Edward Cullen from Twilight and Lorelai Gilmore from The Gilmore Girls” you added, quickly and obviously, but you were a little shaken, you hadn't had an encounter with a cute boy in years.

Chan looked at you with admiration and amusement. You felt like you were in a movie walking with the attractive man in the park who bought you ice cream. Chan didn't take his eyes off you and without stopping laughing, and to have all those references, he thought you must have been young, you looked young, but living on your own in the city? Chan didn't know what it was exactly but he wanted to know more about you, he liked you since he first saw you, you looked just like today, a sunny, but not oppressive sun, spring day, with the green trees and the birds singing.

“I like cats too,” he replied, “But because of my work I travel a lot and it's hard for me to leave them home alone.”

“What do you do for a living…?” you asked without trying to be so obvious as you sat down on an available bench.

“I'm a stylist and creative director” he replied.

At this point you were so nervous you were about to finish your ice cream. You decided to play with him a little, to lighten the mood.

“Stylist in that outfit?” you joked.

Chan laughed genuinely at your comment, he looked and dressed so normal, all in black with a cap and sneakers and called it a day. You could notice his curls under his cap.

“You might be surprised how well I dress people.”

“Mmm who have you dressed?” you asked amused only to continue the conversation.

“It's usually celebrities, and occasionally rich people, I've worked for Jungkook, T-…”

You gasped in surprise which stopped Chan in his tracks.

“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to react like that, it's just, I don't believe you, you're fucking with me, right?”

Chan raised an eyebrow at your comment in such confidence, without wiping off his smile, his cheeks hurt from being with you so much.

“Are you a fan of his?”

“Oh no, just, everyone knows how great he is.”

“Well it's true...” he answered and you saw him go to his cell phone deftly looking for something.

He handed it to you, pictures of him sizing up the celebrity he had just mentioned and putting a jacket over him as proof, you opened your mouths in surprise that you are meeting a man who has direct contact with celebrities. You handed him back his phone.

“I work for specific brands or clients, that's why I travel, I work for Jennie Kim, Troye Sivan, that kid that's everywhere mmm, Olivia Rodrigo, Timothe Ch…”

Your heart stopped and your smile faded for a moment as he called Olivia Rodrigo a kid, you were pretty sure you were pretty close to her age… you wondered how old he could be. You also thought that looking like that, there was no way he wasn't dating a celebrity.

“Okay I got it, now you're just bragging” you replied amused to which he loved the way you teased him, “I think it's great” you said happily, “And also as a creative director?”

“Yes, I direct videos, I give concepts to artists, I usually work a lot for the K-pop world, that's why I'm hardly ever home.”

You looked at him closely, you were excited to meet an art-oriented person who was expert and passionate about what he does, someone intellectual who stimulated your inner self.

“If you dressed Jungkook, what the hell are you doing living in that apartment? I assume you can get something better” you joked again never to end the conversation.

You had already finished your ice cream and your hands were restless not knowing where to settle. Chan laughed again, showing his peculiar dimples, he kept laughing with you close by.

“I've lived in the building for a while now, it's cozy and a very nice place, isn't it?”

You nodded, “It's a nice place…”

“Besides…” he began to say apologetically, tilting his head a little and showing a full smile “it's a magical place full of surprises, just like your new arrival.”

You looked into his eyes and admired every part of him, unable to think that he had said your arrival was a magical surprise. Chan had already finished his ice cream, but he thought there was nothing sweeter that left his mouth like meeting you on a nice sunny day.

“So… you'll be staying here in the city?” you added curiously, since he mentioned he was hardly home, worrying you.

“Yes, at the moment I'm here working from home, I just came back from a business trip; but as soon as my client calls me, I have to go wherever they are” you saw him a little disappointed, promptly thinking that he constantly has to leave, until he spoke bringing you out of your trance, “And you… what do you do for a living?” he asked softly and incredibly attentive to what you had to say.

Your smile faded a little… it wasn't something you said out loud, you felt a little embarrassed but more so when he had a cool job and you… made videos for the internet.

“I make videos…” you said unsurely.

He raised his eyebrow, scared deep down that they weren't adult types of videos, he had nothing against it, but as someone as pretty and young as you, he couldn't help but feel disappointed if that's what it is, since he currently found himself so many girls making money from it.

“You edit videos?” he asked, somewhat alerted.

“Yes that too, well… I'm a YouTuber, not something I'd say proudly after hearing your amazing work history, but I also paint and sell my paintings and, I'm simply inclined to art, but for a living, videos on the internet. I'm also inclined to acting, I currently take online classes but since I'm in the city I really want to try my hand at an academy; you know everyone who thinks they're celebrities these days wants to put out music but I seriously think it's not my forte, I prefer something else” you blurted out suddenly, nervously trying to divert him from the main topic.

Chan laughed tenderly as he carried Berry to put her in the middle of you. He thought you were cute the way you wanted to excuse yourself, and almost sighed in relief that you hadn't been what he maliciously thought.

“That's very good, seriously, you can tell me you're a tiktoker and I'll understand, they make a lot of money nowadays” Chan joked.

You laughed, blushing that maybe it wasn't the kind of woman he was looking for, putting little part of her life on the internet. But you had him completely captivated, he couldn't deny it.

“So what do you do?” he said, you raised your eyebrows, “What do you tape?”

“Mmm little vlogs, things I come up with…”

“And what do you paint?” you looked at him surprised, that among your meaningless chatter, he did pay attention to you.

“Little flower paintings, I don't know, cute things” you laughed.

Cute things like you, wanted to say Chan out loud.

“And how can I find you?”

You widened your eyes in panic, but still told him sweetly, “Literally my name, just like that, I hope I show up.”

Chan stared at you for a while, so happy to have some time to relax.

“I'd love to direct a video, give you some ideas” Chan spoke slowly and seductively, not knowing what he was saying clearly, he just knew he was suddenly lost on you.

“I'd love to share your ideas…” you replied in the same way.

“I'd also love for us to go somewhere else but… I'm taking care of Berry” he mentioned, caressing her, you saw his big, masculine hands, surprising you a little, “Would you like to… have dinner at my place?”

You wanted to open your mouth in surprise, for the first time you would be going alone to a man's apartment, but you just nodded softly.

“You cook?” you asked, Chan nodded, “I also love to cook and bake” you said proudly.

He looked at you tenderly.

[…]

The evening progressed with more talk with Chan, getting to know him more and more, and of a delicious dinner he prepared. You were delighted, you were supposed to start shooting more content today but there was nothing better than spending the night in his apartment and, his decor was just as you imagined it, neutral colors, modern design and all tidy, the place smelled good, he smelled good, everything around him looked like a dream.

He came to drop you off at your door, balancing on your heels on the door frame, so close to him and admiring every part of his face, his cute little eyes, his full lips, you felt like you were in your own little rom-com. Chan leaned against your door frame, unwilling to let you go.

“Do you… want to see Edward and Lorelai?” you said nervously to which he nodded softly with a smile.

Chan watched you, you looked so cute to him that he wanted to squeeze your cheeks and shower you with kisses, but he just said yes to every little thing you said.

Your cats were in your cat tree, you let Chan pass by, who slyly watched your whole apartment.

“Orange one is Edward.”

Chan approached your cats, you had a cute Halloween combination, orange and black, who antipathetic and yet alert let themselves be petted, after he spoke to them in a high pitched tone, with tenderness. He came up to you.

“They're very cute, just like you” he said and your cheeks grew warm, you blushed so often with him, you hated it when your body reacted like that, “Do you mind if… tomorrow we go to the park on a picnic or something?”

You frowned, hard to believe what he was saying but you agreed.

“Goodnight, Chan” you said goodbye to him.

Within half an hour Chan had started following you on Instagram where to your surprise you found that he had more than twice as many followers as you and his feed was as sleek and tidy as he was, filled with celebrities he worked for and the occasional photo of him; he for his part was delighted with the cute and cuddly side you showed your life on social media and, you also noticed that he had bought the 10 paintings you had for sale on your website.

[…]

“You bought all my paintings” was the first thing you said to him when you saw him.

Chan's smile got bigger, “I had to, they were really good, you can help me put them in my apartment.”

You looked at him, not sure what he was up to but you just knew you were quickly falling for him.

You both went to the park.

“All right, you paint Berry and I'll paint… you have to choose between Edward or Lorelai to paint them” Chan spoke.

You were both on your date, on a picnic he planned, you had had this kind of outing with your girlfriends but not with a boy, this was definitely your kind of date. You looked at Chan, who was still looking all manly with his strong legs showing in his shorts despite doing soft and sweet activities.

You sighed in surprise, “You can't make me choose between two of my children.”

Chan laughed, “Okay, I'll paint them both and then we'll show each other our paintings at the same time.”

You nodded, “Show me a picture of Berry.”

“And you of your cats.”

Amid laughter, chatter and complicit glances, you finished your works, showing them. Chan's painting was good, not the best, they were a little crooked, but it was nice and you appreciated it and yours, truly and effortlessly you had excelled, Chan looked at you with admiration as he praised your work, no doubt you were someone worth getting to know more.

You spent the day together, he walked you around the city and as you were united walking side by side in your wide hallway of the building, he said to you:

“What's a movie that you can watch over and over again without getting tired and... would you like to see it in my apartment?”

The next thing you knew you were having your first movie night date with a man, since he wasn't a boy. Slowly you brought your bodies together and shortly after the middle of the movie you couldn't help but admire him a little, his pronounced side in profile, his strong arms; you wondered if you should kiss him or would you look like an easy girl, you had just met him but you weren't much of a fan of the slow burn, at least not in real life, that could stay on TV and books, you wanted Chan now.

Chan licked his lips and noticed that you didn't stop looking at him and slowly turned to see you, you abruptly averted your gaze in embarrassment. Chan sighed and moved closer to you, making you more tense, not because it made you uncomfortable, but because you really liked him and suddenly your body was acting weird. You stopped paying attention to the movie and only thought about the time and the anxiety that was slowly consuming you, you wanted to kiss him but you didn't know how to get closer, you wanted to taste his lips to check your fantasies that he really had it all and kissed well.

Chan noticed it instantly, your nervous body, your light sighs, he was going to take a chance and if you rejected him, at least it would be worth it.

He came close to your ear and his plan wasn't to sound this seductive, he still said it in that tone, “It's obvious you're not paying attention to the movie, why don't you better come and pay attention to me.”

You almost moaned loudly at what he said, it was so cringe, it was so fucking sexy it worked for you, coming from him everything worked.

You turned to look at him.

“Do you want me to kiss you?” he asked.

You nodded without measuring anything that was happening, you just watched his slightly illuminated face for the TV light and move closer to yours and suddenly you met his lips, Chan started to move them over yours, you tasted the softness and how smoothly his fleshy lips were, then slowly he moved closer to you, when you unintentionally held onto his shirt, he started to kiss you deeper, his prominent nose colliding with your face, both breathless but unable to stop, addicted to the feel of each other until you broke apart.

“Come here” Chan whispered to you taking you by the waist and inviting you to sit on him for which you complied.

You let yourself fall into his lap with your body facing him, your legs beside his thighs, as you wrapped around his neck, ready to return to your sizzling make out session. This time Chan kissed you more desperately and excitedly, groping your whole body and tasting your tongue, at this point you were already so wet, his big hand stroking your body and the exquisite sounds of his lips colliding and his altered breathing made you so hot.

And that's when, as you let your body fall slightly, you felt his notorious, throbbing erection in your center, you were shocked, you didn't know whether to stop or continue but you didn't want to stop kissing him and you were getting more and more turned on. You separated, you saw his swollen, reddish lips and an expression on his face that you had never seen before, it was his usual look of tenderness combined with dark desire. Chan couldn't take it anymore and in a thick voice whispered:

“Should we continue this… or do you want to stop?”

You bit your lip, if you stopped there was nothing good in return, just you going to your apartment embarrassed and with your panties wet, yet you were so curious about what might happen if you didn't stop. You nodded and he looked at you confused.

“We should… continue” you sighed.

Chan smiled and kissed you again, running his hands down your back, this time under your blouse, unhooking your bra. You pulled away from him a little terrified and excited and let him remove your clothes, he brushed his lips down your neck until he reached your breasts where he sucked them hard, causing you to moan, but Chan wanted to make you feel so good that he was only going to focus on you and your pretty moans, so he had to take good care and treat your bottom area very well.

He pulled away from you and stared at you as he unbuttoned your shorts and then slid his big hand down and started stroking your clit over your panties with his long fingers. You gasped again, ecstatic and happy to be attended. You kissed again as between sighs you felt the satisfaction of his fingers rubbing your spot, you were enjoying it but it only made you wetter and needier and that Chan saw it reflected in your awkward but passionate kisses and your constant moans.

“C'mon sweetie, take off his shorts so I can touch you better” he whispered to you, “Gonna make you cum.”

With your breath hitching and heart racing, you heeded him, quickly standing up and removing your tiny shorts to sit on his lap again, this time your wet center feeling the stiffness of his cock. Chan gasped, you raised your ass a little and he wrapped his arm around your ass, sliding your folds aside with his hands and seeking your entrance, pulling the fabric of your panties aside, he stroked you a little, sliding all your wetness down your hole and inserted two of his slick, long fingers into your soft walls. You gasped, it felt so good to have your pussy filled.

“Oh, that's it dear, you feel so good, do you like it?” groaned Chan sweetly to you in a whisper which you whimpered in response.

Chan started to ram you with his fingers making you let out soft little whimpers, it felt so good, you could hear the wetness of your pussy being fucked, you were a little embarrassed to be so wet but you couldn't control it, your body was going crazy for Chan, as he enjoyed your sweet sounds coming out of your mouth and how choked his cock was in his denim shorts, he loved feeling the tightness inside you with the wetness of your pussy slipping on his fingers and, in a gasp and shudder, you felt your orgasm filling your body, spilling onto Chan's fingers and dripping onto his clothes.

You were beginning to feel ashamed, when you felt Chan's hands grip your waist tightly and cling to his cock as he bit his lip.

“Oh, you're so fucking sweet, c'mon” he moaned, moving your ass with his grip around his cock, squeezing it.

You turned on again in seconds and you understood everything, the heat of the moment took the best of you and you unbuttoned his shorts, being you now the one who put her hand in his crotch, feeling his wide hard cock over his boxers, you were surprised, you squeezed and caressed, trying to reach his tip but it was a bit difficult to which Chan helped you a bit to pull them down, finally seeing his prominent package and his dripping precum on his clothes.... once again you acted out of desire and lust and pulled down his underwear, revealing his member so highly visually appealing and large, you began to stroke it, and instantly turned to look at Chan, who was panting in pleasure. Once again you were so aroused, you wanted to do so many things but you just limited yourself to positioning his cock between your folds and start rubbing yourself on it, rubbing your soaking wet pussy through the feel of the fabric of your panties, while Chan revelled in the sensation with soft mmm's and you held tightly around his neck, and between kissing, fondling and Chan's stimulation of your breasts with his mouth, tongue and lips, the sizzling act brought you both to orgasm.

Both of your bodies trembled, Chan whimpered an “Oh, fuck” and you felt his throbbing sex and warm cum shoot between your folds.

Both of you had heavy breathing and suddenly you fell to realize what you had done, once again the heat now took over your cheeks and you tried to hide in Chan's neck; he smiled broadly and noticed your reaction.

“It's okay, princess, look at me, hey, it was beautiful, I loved it” he said sweetly, trying to get your attention.

You looked into his eyes in sorrow and he confessed in a whisper close to your lips, “Is it wrong that... I just met you but I feel I like you a lot? I'll take you on every cute date so we can get to know each other better.”

[...]

And so, after that night began a frantic story between you and your neighbor Chan, who was a little older than you and a mature man with his life and goals set, but he loved to do little things with you and help you and then have a fiery scene of making out and touching, you love to caress his hair every time you kissed him and he liked to help you in recording content and he would tell you how he was going to help you to offer you more work with recognized brands and, as days went by there was this afternoon, where he helped you and was there watching you recording, you were a little embarrassed but little by little you got used to it, and for some reason, your outfit consisted of a very short white plaid skirt, which drove Chan crazy in seconds.

He watched you attentively, sitting on your couch watching every little shot you made with your phone, you were completely dressed up while Chan was comfortable in his sportswear and black sleeveless shirt attached to his worked and muscular body, he was crazy about your short skirt revealing a little bit of your ass and how pretty you looked, while you were messed up seeing his biceps and marked pecs.

You finished recording your silly video, feeling embarrassed having Chan's heavy gaze on you the whole time as he smiled downwards at you and hugged one of your couch cushions, finally he stood up and walked over to you, unable to control his urges and placed his hands on your waist exposed by your short top. You raised your gaze slightly and smiled at him, he wordlessly moved closer to you to kiss you which you accepted by wrapping your arms around his neck.

“That little skirt is kind of dangerous, I feel lucky to see it on you before all your followers” Chan whispered to you, his hands moving down to your butt and squeezing it.

You were surprised and looked at him mischievously, and he surprised you again as he carried you by grabbing your ass and kissed you again, taking you a few steps to your room; for some reason you were aroused, and it was that particularly his strong arms with visible veins were doing in your arousal something, you hadn't had something sexual since that night in his apartment, you thought maybe it was time for something more.

Chan sat on your bed, leaving you on top of him, this time you kissed more passionately and desperately, both in the same synchrony and idea of what was about to happen, completely devoted to each other. And suddenly, you had the idea of tasting his cock. You smiled and lowered your kisses down to his neck, slowly you rolled off his lap and got on your knees between his legs, Chan licked his lips as he understood immediately and let you play with him a little as you slowly removed his shorts; Chan reflexively reached out his hand and it bumped into your camera on your bed, and a dirty idea occurred to him.

Chan grabbed your camera, turned it on and prepared to record, recording you making eye contact and finding it so fucking hot to him holding a camera at such a promising angle.

“Oh yeah, c'mon babygirl, suck my cock, is this your favorite YouTuber? She's a little fucking whore, look at…. ahh” Chan started to say but was cut off as he finally felt your mouth on his glans, “Mmm, she's taking my cock so well.”

You smiled with his cock in your mouth and began to suck him off, sucking his length to feel your tongue and cheeks, making him feel so good that he even gasped pitilessly.

You loved the feel of him, his big cock in your mouth while your hands caressed the rest of his member and from time to time you played with his balls, making Chan whimper and shudder, who at this point downplayed the camera in his hand and enjoyed live and direct the image of you on his cock, Chan stroked your hair, the muscles of his thighs trembled and in a sizzling whimper, Chan cum in your mouth.

You smiled happily, licking the cum from his length and swallowing every liquid deposited in you. Chan stroked your cheek for a few moments and gently motioned for you to stand up, then gently laid you down on the bed.

Once again, Chan held the camera and recorded the filthy process of lifting your skirt and removing your wet panties, finally getting a full shot of your soaking wet, throbbing pussy.

“Fuck” cursed Chan softly and aroused.

You looked so exquisite to him that he thought the camera didn't do you justice, you were a thousand times better in person. You watched him with desire and pleading eyes, inwardly begging to feel his big cock fill you with more.

“Take off your shirt” you whined, you wanted to see his abs.

Chan smiled arrogantly, he dropped the camera drop on your bed and obeyed your command, you bit your lip, you wanted him in missionary to have him close and touch his marked abs. Now, you were so needy. He took your camera again, with one hand he put your knees together and lifted them higher in the air, he stopped holding your legs and you left them like that, watching his dirty act of filming your pussy, Chan took his big cock and rubbed it on your pussy, making you gasp.

“What a fucking dirty slut, so ready to get fuck, isn't this y/n, your favorite little internet person, oh she's so fucking needy for my cock, aren't you, beautiful?”

You gasped as you felt his cock hit your vulva and then rub it through your folds and labia. Chan spread your legs again and finally entered you slowly and, capturing every scene of your tight hole stretching to make way for his cock.

You whimpered, slightly trembling and trying to adjust to his size, Chan sighed excitedly finally at the feel of you inside and began to fuck you slowly and recording a couple of moments, then throwing the camera back onto your bed and pulling his body closer to you, where he sweetly gave you kisses around your face as he rammed you moderately, sliding expertly into you.

“Faster, Chan” you begged, to which he smiled, more than happy to follow your commands.

You arched your back as you felt his strong, deep thrusts, filling your entire pussy to the deepest part of you, his tip brushing your cervix without issue due to his size and you felt your body fade beneath his. You entwined your legs around his waist and hugged him as he continued to ram your pussy hard, his warm moans in your ear.

You were so close, you hugged him tighter and your thighs gradually lost strength, trembling and falling into a deep orgasm at the sensation of his cock moving inside you. Chan continued for a while and finally cum inside you, relaxing his exhausted body a little on top of you.

He kissed your cheek sweetly, pulled away from you and, as a final shot, filmed his cock coming out of your hole as he was doing the perfect creampie scene.

Chan threw the camera back and moved closer to your tired body, showering your face with kisses, appreciating that you still had little traces of him around your mouth.

“I loved that, baby, that was so good” he whispered sweetly in your ear, "The little skirts on you drive me crazy."

[…]

The next day you set about starting to edit your videos and found yourself…. with the grotesque and silly footage Chan had made of you having sex, completely worthy of a homemade porn video, morbidly you watched it again, video shots moving, Chan shaking and his heavy breathing in the background, which turned you on a little, his comments in his thick voice, you sucking his cock and then him rubbing it in your pussy, shit, you were so horny, you couldn't help but watch in detail how good his cock looked for the camera, doing it complete justice, you had a very good camera after all.

You sighed totally aroused and almost as if by magic, there was a knock on your door, you paused the video, luckily at a part where Chan put the camera aside and your sheet was recorded. And you ran to your door knowing it was Chan, once you saw him you jumped into his arms, he laughed and returned the unexpected hug.

Chan had brought you flowers, you thanked him genuinely and gave him a kiss on the cheek, he was so sweet, you liked him so much but just now you needed him so much too. You quickly put his flowers in water and in a vase in the center of the counter.

“What were you doing, princess?” he asked you.

You decided to be honest and quick.

“I was editing my videos and came across what you shot yesterday, honestly I'm horny.”

Chan let out a chuckle at your honesty and walked over to you.

“And who am I to say no to you when you're like that?”

You bit your bottom lip as your smile got bigger, once again you kissed.

“Mm, you should watch the video later, you look so fucking good” you whispered to him between the small moments you parted.

“Fuck, I'm dying to see how I fuck you, but it's better to always live it up” he gasped, so needy with his throbbing cock.

You both headed back to your room, where Chan subtly motioned you to sit on your bed and, he with no time to waste, lifted up your little wool pajama top to reveal your breasts and pulled down your tiny shorts you were wearing altogether, he knelt between your legs and began to give hot and loud kisses down your belly all the way down to your mons pubis, he quickly got rid of your panties, and spread your legs to give him a better view of your pussy.

You were so aroused at his slightest movement, Chan smiled at the image of your exposed pussy and murmured, “I'm going to make you feel so good, princess.”

And, for the first time in your encounters, he directed his mouth to your pussy, gently caressing your clit with one finger, making you gasp and shudder at the sensation of his mouth on your cunt.

Chan licked the entire length of your folds, unashamed and totally satisfied with your taste, you were getting wetter and wetter, giving more and more way for Chan to enjoy your soaking wet pussy with delicious slurping sounds, you gasped and let your head fall back, completely yielding and pleased. You looked back at Chan, whose face was buried in your pussy, his big nose bumping against your labia and his tongue licking every taste in you; you bit your lip and stroked his hair, Chan made eye contact with you, he was enjoying it so much that he would end up cumming in his pants without any trouble merely with the feel of your soft wet pussy in his mouth.

With his free hand Chan began to fondle your breasts, completely ecstatic with pleasuring you, giving your sweet whimpers in response, which encouraged him more and more. Chan bit your labia softly, licked and sucked and, withdrew his hand from your breasts, to lean a little and separate your orifice, appreciating how needy it was, to then insert his tongue and feel your insides, you gasped more intensely, relaxing your body completely and, after an exquisite series of movements on your pussy with his mouth, you came to orgasm, panting loudly and seeing stars, Chan had eaten your pussy so fucking well.

Chan was also so close and cursed under his breath as he felt cum in his pants as he savored your sweet, glistening fluid from your orgasm.

He raised his face, and saw you, both of you happy, your chest rising and falling trying to settle down normal, him licking his mouth still with your taste, but Chan's smile was instantly wiped off, he recognized the sound of the door perfectly, his apartment sounded the same, he stood up quickly alerted.

“Did you hear that? Someone came in, are you expecting someone?”

You looked at him confused and instantly remembered, your mother and sister were coming to visit you, you had arranged it days ago on the phone and you had already warned the doorman to always let your mother and sister in up to your apartment. You closed your legs immediately and hurriedly pulled up your panties and shorts, your heart racing. Chan also stood up quickly and headed towards your bathroom as you frantically motioned for him to go in there.

You came out with a smile, brushing your hair a little.

“Heeey” you greeted.

“Where were you?” said your mother going to hug you.

You felt a little dirty, a few minutes ago you had an incredible orgasm leaving a mess. Suddenly your mother heard a noise in the bathroom.

“Is anyone else here?” she asked.

“My… neighbor” you replied to which your sister smiled broadly, “the toilet wasn't working right and he wanted to fix it.”

“Oh, honey, but why him, is he a plumber? Let me see what's wrong with…” mentioned your mother ready to go to the bathroom but noticed your sister's complicit look, “Why are you looking at each other like that…? Is he the boy Kaia told me about?”

“Chan is here?” your sister asked smiling.

“You told mom about him?” was all you could say.

Your sister knew nothing of your encounters, really the last thing she knew about Chan was when he showed up in the hallway. With embarrassed steps, you made your way to the bathroom, opening the door carefully where a shy Chan stepped out, his face and hands clean.

“Is… the bathroom ready?” you asked him, waiting for him to catch on to what he did instantly.

“Ah yes, it was nothing really.”

“Thank you.”

“I'm Bang Chan, nice to meet you” he introduced himself to your mother who smiled at him and received the gesture.

Still your mother was no fool, she knew immediately that the two of you were up to something, or maybe you were in the middle of something. Your embarrassed faces gave both you and Chan away.

“Hi, Chan” greeted Kaia, looking mischievously at him knowing that he was also there with you for something and that the bathroom was just an excuse.

He greeted her shyly and your sister's attention focused on your laptop on the counter, she approached the laptop animatedly,

“Ohhh, you're editing a new video, what's it about?”

You panicked and ran to close your laptop, causing her surprise and confusion, if she pressed play she was about to see the pornographic home video of you and Chan. You almost dry salivated, so terrified.

“It's a very important and secret video” you replied, sketching a smile and looking quickly towards Chan.

It was kind of weird, but you had to explain that you were in a way, dating him.

--------

𐙚TAGLIST: @rylea08 @hann1bee @iovecb97 @armystay89

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i-messed-up-big-time · 2 months ago

Text

Lonely Birthday - Zayne

Zayne x Non Mc/Reader

a/n: here is Zayne's part! i hope you guys like it, gonna start working on sylus' soon, once im done drowning in assignments 😵‍💫

divider creds: @/cafekitsune

Tags: angst, happy ending, female pronouns, reader is not MC, female pronouns, cursing, reader is on their period, use of pet names (honey, my love), mentions of feeling insecure

word count: 3.4k

masterlist

Xavier Rafayel Sylus Caleb

Who knew that one could feel lonely even when they were with someone.

You were at Zayne's place for the weekend, wanting to spend some quality time with him, which is very rare with your conflicting schedules but you guys have always made it work somehow.

With his busy schedule you were never the one to get upset about him forgetting a few dates, he always managed to make it up to you.

You always kept quiet about your birthday, never too crazy about getting a lot of attention on just one specific day out of the year. You just liked spending your birthday with your loved ones doing something simple and eating some cake.

You were sprawled out on the couch, your mind giving up from all the paperwork you had to do. Being a business owner was no easy work, the endless amount of paperwork and business meetings always left your head reeling.

You had decided to take a much needed break, and that's how you ended up on the couch.

Bored out of your mind you scrolled through you social media, coming across an adorable video of a cat, you were about to send it to Zayne when you decided it would be more fun to show it to him in person, that way you could also get him to take a break with you too.

Getting up, you made your to his study. You saw him focused on the screen, typing away like a man on a mission.

He noticed you lingering by the door and beckoned you over to him. Happily making your way over you show him your phone screen.

A small smile makes it's way onto his face and the sight of the cat.

"Take a short break with me. You've been cooped up in here for hours."

You grabbed his chair and turned it so it was facing you and not his computer screen. Zayne opened his mouth to reject your offer but you were one step ahead of him.

"I have some of your favourite desserts in the kitchen."

He let out a small chuckle, grabbing your hand and taking you to the kitchen where his desserts await him.

You giggled at how cute he was, always ready to chow down on dessert.

You guys were silently enjoying the desserts together, his presence bringing you comfort.

But what would life be if it didn't interrupt your time together.

Zayne's pager went off. You let out a sigh of disappointed when he gave you that look that said 'I'm sorry but I have to go,' he kissed your forehead and quickly got ready to go to the hospital.

You walked him to the door, pulling him in for a quick kiss before bidding farewell to your ever so busy boyfriend.

The house was no even more quiet than it was before, you didn't want to be upset about being alone on one of your very rare work from home days.

If you thought your day couldn't get any better, you were in for a treat.

You felt all too familiar pain in your lower abdomen.

Letting out a little scream of annoyance, you made your way to the room you and Zayne share. Grabbing a shirt out of his closet and a pair of comfy sweats, you made your way to the shower.

●・○・●・○・●・

The shower was exactly what you needed.

Zayne, being the ever caring boyfriend, always had the bathroom stocked with all your feminine necessities for situations like this.

You dried up your hair and went straight to the bed, wanting to snuggle into the sheets.

You shot your secretary a message, she would handle everything in your absence.

Going to be spending the next few days with Zayne. Also just got my period so I'll be away from work, call me if there's anything urgent. If not, I expect you to handle everything.

Putting your phone down, you got comfortable and let sleep take over. It was nice and peaceful, almost like the calm before the storm.

●・○・●・○・●・

The next day you woke up to Zayne's side of the bed being cold, indicating that he had yet to return from work.

Letting out a sigh of disappointment you decided to freshen up and make some breakfast.

As you walked to the kitchen your eyes caught the date.

Oh, it's my birthday today.

You let a small smile grace your face, knowing that you and Zayne would at least spend the day together when he gets back, he always makes sure you're at the forefront of his priorities, outside of work that is.

You turned on some music and started humming along as you maneuvered around the kitchen. Just as you finished cooking you heard the door open.

You peeked your head out the kitchen and noticed Zayne taking off his shoes and coat. You made your way towards him but he just rushed off to your shared bedroom, not even a word of a greeting to you.

"What the heck was that?"

You were confused, you know Zayne had his off days but he wouldn't go as far as to you ignore you.

Following him to the room, you found him seated at the edge of the bed with his head in his hands.

Carefully making your way over to him, you softly called out to him.

"Zayne? Are you doing ok honey?"

You knelt in front of him, trying to get a look at his face. Reaching up you tried to move his hands from his face, but you were taken aback by the way he flinched away from your touch.

He got up from his spot and made his way to the bathroom, you were stuck in your spot for a moment before you jumped up and followed him.

"Zayne tell me what's wrong."

You asked, and what you got in response was something you never expected from him.

"Can you just leave me alone right now? I don't need you following me around like a lost puppy."

His voice was cold but you still pushed a bit, not wanting to give up.

"I just wanted to know—"

"I need you to stop talking already. I've had a long night and I'd prefer if I could just have some peace and quiet for once."

He cut you off, and as much as you would hate to admit it, you felt hurt by his words.

Without another word, you quietly left his room and went back to the kitchen.

You tried to eat the breakfast you made but your appetite was ruined. To make matters worse your cramps came back full force, you clutched your stomach in pain, silently cursing the gods for making you a woman.

Great, just great. Could this day get any worse?

Famous last words.

●・○・●・○・●・

You later got a call from your assistant about some urgent matters.

Apparently, some of your board of directors were colluding with your rival company and selling confidential information about a product that was yet to be released to the public, mainly due to the fact that it still had major faults that could be damaging.

You made yourself at home in the guest bedroom, not wanting to see Zayne in fear he might get upset at you again.

You were a strong and independent business woman, but at the end of the day you were still just a young woman still learning to navigate through life. Zayne's words had you feeling sad and a bit insecure, your mind constantly bouncing back and forth between finding a solution for the damage the information leak will cause your company and the fact that you might just be an inconvenience to Zayne.

Sighing, you decided to grab your bags and head to your apartment instead. Knowing if you stuck around here any longer you might just fall into a deeper pit of despair.

●・○・●・○・●・

A couple of hours had passed by and not once did Zayne message or call you.

So much for not falling into a deeper pit of despair.

Your period was making your emotions ten times worse than they already were.

You sat on your couch, you felt so lonely. Your day was just not going well, and you didn't even have any hopes that it would get better. It was just one problem after another.

You felt that familiar sting in your eyes, and instead of holding it in like you normally do, you let it all out.

Lately you've been having such bad days, it was like someone put some evil eye on you. You wouldn't doubt it if that was the case.

You felt tired after crying for so long, you didn't want to think of it this way but this was by far your worst birthday ever.

I just wanted to have a nice and relaxing day with Zayne.

Your lip quivered as a new wave of tears streamed down your face at the thought of your boyfriend, and how he had acted earlier today. You wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt that he probably just had a bad day, but you're still human at the end of the day. You still get hurt even if the other person didn't mean to hurt you.

Before you could wallow in sadness even more you got a call from your best friend, Tara. Needing a distraction you answered the call.

"Happy birthday bestie!"

You let out a little chuckle, her happiness rubbing off on you a little.

"Thanks Tara, how have you been? Hunter's Association keeping you busy?"

Your best friend was a data analyzer for the Hunter's Association, her job kept her busy so getting the chance to talk or meet up with her was rare.

"It's been busy, but we got to go home early today! Apparently one of the new hunters shares the same birthday as you!"

"Oh really, that's nice."

"Yeah, it was last minute but she wanted us to get some hotpot together, so that's where we're headed right now. Oh wait, is that your boyfriend?"

You sat up like you got shocked.

Zayne? What is he doing? Did he not even notice you left his place?

Your mind was running a mile a minute thinking about all the possibilities.

"Oh, I didn't think he knew MC. Why isn't he with you right now?"

Tara's question had you feeling upset and annoyed.

So he can push me away when I just wanted to know if he was okay, but now he's out celebrating someone else's birthday? While completely forgetting about mine?

"Oh I've been caught up at work so we planned on celebrating another day."

You said after a moment of silence, Tara seemed to have bought your excuse.

"Okay, as long as you knew he was coming here. I'll keep an eye out for anyone trying to get too cozy with him, you can count on me!"

Tara exclaimed, she always had your back no matter what. Which is why you felt bad about lying, but this was something you needed to deal with yourself.

You wrapped up your call with Tara, and decided you would just spend the evening on your own.

You freshened up a bit and stepped out to grab some of your favourite take out and desserts.

●・○・●・○・●・

You settled onto your couch and pulled up a show that has been sitting in your watchlist for a while now, finally getting the time to watch it.

You silently ate your take out, the show was interesting enough to keep you distracted from your depressing thoughts.

That didn't last for long though, when you got to your dessert your mind started to wander as the dessert reminded you of your boyfriend who was a fiend for anything sweet.

You let out a sad chuckle as you took a bite of the dessert before pushing it away, no longer in the mood to have anything sweet.

You grabbed the blanket that was on the back of the couch and decided to get comfy. Today was draining and now you just needed to become one with the couch.

The sound of the TV lulled you to sleep, the day being wiped from your brain as you fell into a dreamless sleep.

●・○・●・○・●・

At MC's dinner, Tara was seated across from Zayne. She eyed him down, wondering why he wouldn't just stay at home and wait for you instead of being here.

She wasn't one to comment on what people do with their free time, but it was odd to see him here, and for MC's birthday when it's just coworkers.

For the entirety of the dinner Tara silently observes him and MC, obviously he would never do anything to hurt you, but one could never say the same about other people.

Near the end of the dinner, Tara pulled out the gift she had prepared for you, knowing Zayne would be seeing you sooner than she'll see you she handed it to him.

He gave her a confused look as he eyed the gift bag.

"It's Y/N's birthday gift. You'll see her sooner than I will so can you give it to her?"

If it wasn't for Tara paying close attention, she would have missed the way his eyes widened just a fraction before silently nodding and taking the gift, bidding her farewell before rushing out.

I've never seen that man run out so fast.

Tara thought, turning her attention to MC as they made plans to go to karoke.

●・○・●・○・●・

Zayne had never felt as disappointed in himself more than he did today.

He not only had been extremely rude to you this morning, he also forgot your birthday.

He had no excuse, no matter how stressful or busy work got, he should've at least remembered what today was.

Rushing back home, he looked around for you. He couldn't find you anywhere, it seemed like you hadn't been home for a while. Zayne also noticed your keys weren't there either.

Did she go somewhere? But where could she have gone.

He racked his brain for any ideas of where you could have gone, taking a shot he decided to go to your apartment first. Hoping that you would be there.

●・○・●・○・●・

Once he got to your apartment, he hesitated to open the door. Unsure of whether you would want to see him or not.

He gathered some courage and opened the door, the sight in front of him had his chest hurting.

There you were, curled up on the couch with take out containers and a barely eaten dessert on the coffee table in front of you.

It seemed you had fallen asleep watching a show.

Zayne carefully made his way towards you, picking up the garbage to throw it out, and then packing the dessert away into the fridge.

After cleaning up he made his way back to the living room and knelt down in front of you. Immediately, he noticed how your eyes were red and puffy with a wet spot on the pillow indicating that you had cried yourself to sleep.

His chest felt tight looking at you like that. You were always so strong, barely ever giving into negative feelings, but I guess everyone has their limits.

Zayne gently gathered you into his arms and made his way towards your room. After tucking you in he decided to wash up and join you, hoping you would forgive him for neglecting you all day.

He slipped into bed quietly as to not wake you up, he pulled you in closer to him so that your head was against his chest and his arms were wrapped around your waist.

"I'm so sorry my love. When you wake up I'll make it up to you, I promise."

He placed a gentle kiss at the top of your head, letting himself relax with you in his arms.

●・○・●・○・●・

You woke up to arms wrapped around you, your brain not having caught up to the situation allowed your body to snuggle closer in to the warmth that surrounded you.

Wait didn't I fall asleep on the couch?

You shot up, or well tried to, the arms holding you restricted you from moving too much.

Looking up you came face to face with Zayne, seeing him brought back all of your feelings from yesterday and you tried to wiggle out of his grasp, only for him to tighten his hold even more.

"Stop moving so much and get some more rest."

His eyes were still closed as he spoke.

It irritated you that he could just act like everything was ok. You continued to move around until you finally escaped his grasp, darting straight to the bathroom.

You locked yourself in, not wanting him to come in. You didn't want to just forget it all and move on, it wasn't fair.

You were so lost in your thoughts you didn't hear Zayne knocking on the door.

"My love, are you ok? Can you please open the door?"

He spoke softly, as if he didn't want to upset me further.

You felt like you were being childish, but you wanted to ignore him the same way he ignored your requests about whether he was ok, and lets not get started about him forgetting your birthday.

You quickly freshened up and opened the door, Zayne stood in front of the door, patiently waiting for you.

He was about to say something but you just slid past him, not wanting to hear him out.

Desperate, Zayne grabbed your arm and pulled you to his chest, wrapping his arms around your waist to prevent you from walking away from him.

You wiggled in his hold. You felt your resolve to ignore him slipping the longer you stayed in his embrace.

He slowly moved backwards towards the bed, sitting down on it with you now in his lap.

You gave in and started crying, Zayne rocked you back and forth while rubbing a hand soothingly on your back.

“I’m sorry my love, I know it’s not an excuse but I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

He grabs ahold of your face and brings it to face him. The tears streaming down your face make him feel like a sinner.

He wipes them away as you slowly begin to calm down.

“Why did you go to her birthday dinner.”

You didn’t even have to say a name for him to know. He pulls out his phone to show you his texts with her, she basically lied to him about her heart condition acting up to get him to come out, and unfortunately it worked.

“I was concerned for my patient, it was nothing more than that. I was backed into a corner when she had asked me to join them for dinner.”

If there was one thing for sure, Zayne was never a man who would lie, even with reason. He always spoke the truth no matter what. This situation was also no exception.

“She was just one of my childhood friends who was diagnosed with a rare heart condition, if my head was screwed on right yesterday I would have never said yes. I’d rather spend my time with you.”

He gave you an adorable smile, but that didn’t mean you’d let him off the hook.

“You’re going to have to work for your forgiveness mister. Yesterday really hurt me, I’ve never felt more alone in a relationship than I did yesterday and we were supposed to be spending time together.”

You spoke, you needed to let him know how you felt, you wanted your relationship to work and in order to do that you needed to communicate.

Zayne nodded in agreement.

“I wouldn’t want you to forgive me so easily either.”

He pulled you in for a hug, wanting to comfort you as much as possible.

It was then you got this amazing idea, you knew exactly how you were going to get back at him.

“For making me sad your punishment is no desserts for a week.”

Zayne was about to protest what you interrupted him.

“Say one word of disagreement and I’ll extend it by another week.”

That got him to promptly close his mouth and begrudgingly agree.

“You also owe me massages for the whole week, I got my period and I’m sore all over.”

Now Zayne felt even more upset.

You were already in pain and I just added more to it.

Zayne thought.

“I’ll do anything you ask of me my love, whatever makes you happy.”

He pulled you in for a kiss, it was soft and sweet. Zayne’s actions always were louder than his words.

You kissed him back, enjoying the warmth he gave you both inside and out. You guys had your ups and downs but you always managed to make it work.

Zayne would be damned if he ever let someone so precious slip through his fingers.

338 notes · View notes

sevikafucker · 4 months ago

Text

Blindfold

Sevika X F!Reader

You get caught not listening when Silco and Sevika are speaking with you. It bites you in the ass. But the cards still seem to be in your favor.

A/N: Reader is meant to be a highly trained fighter. Something like red room. Nothing is too in depth but I'm thinking about making another one-shot going deep into that idea. I don't think I've ever written WLW smut before??? I hope this is as good as I intended it to be! This is just what I want to do to her. As always, reader is living out my dreams. divider by cafekitsune

CW: SMUT! 18+ (please consume media responsibly), no use of y/n, experienced reader, nonsexual blindfolding, nonsexual biting, vaginal fingering, oral, not beta read

Word count: 2.6k

Your eyes watched Sevika. Always on Sevika. She was focused on Silco though. They were speaking, but you heard nothing of what they were talking about. Your eyes locked in on her waist as she shifted her weight. Her stomach was very much visible.

Fuck.

She was killing you. You wanted nothing more than to be between those legs. You wanted to make her-

“Do you think you could do that?” Silco asked you. His lips were in a line. He knew you were not listening.

“Oh,” You let out a low laugh, “I could do that blindfolded.” You waved a hand around as if it were nothing. You had this in the bag.

Silco smiled widely, suddenly you felt fear. Wrong answer. You wanted to run when Sevika stepped towards you. It was not in your nature to run, but you really did not want to cause any strife with the woman you yearned for.

“Get this girl a blindfold.” Silco looked at Sevika.

You were going to burst. You gave Silco a confused look and Sevika excused herself. You let out a nervous laugh and Silco laced his fingers together. He watched you with a hint of excitement in his eyes What the fuck did I agree to? You did not want to ask. Your pride seemed to get the best of you.

“You are highly trained?” Silco asked, his eyebrows furrowing.

“Yes, sir.” You nodded. “I trained for years, under horrible circumstances really. One time-”

Sevika made her return, interrupting you, a thick strip of fabric in hand. Your stomach flipped and you swallowed hard. If you were lucky, she was going to get freaky with you in the middle of Silco’s office. You could not be so lucky. Instead, Sevika came up behind you and asked if you were ready.

“Um,” You put a hand up, “can I get a refresher? On what I’m doing?”

Silco’s sick smile only widened, and he looked to Sevika. Her dark eyes met yours and a shiver ran down your spine. “You said you could fight me. Blindfolded.”

“Oh, I did.” You nodded. “I did say that.” You pretended to remember. “But,” You look around, “here in the office is a little, I don’t know, uncaring. Don’t you think, sir?” You looked at Silco, nails scraping for any semblance of sympathy.

Sadly, all you get is apathy.

“Just don’t break anything.”

Oh, this is totally normal. You gave Sevika a look of uncertainty and she brought the blindfold up. “Are you ready?” You bit back a groan and nodded. ‘Just don’t break anything’ rings through your skull. How the fuck do I keep from doing that? Sevika placed the blindfold over your eyes and tied it. Tight.

There was a thick silence and then Sevika’s hand gently brushed your face. “You can’t see?” You shook your head. “Good.” Sevika stepped in front of you and took several steps, you heard her. You heard her boots hit the ground and summed she was turning to face you.

You knew that begging was not an option. You knew that you had to face the consequences of your actions, of your lust. You took a deep breath and readied yourself. You kept steady, bringing your fists up, and listening. Closely. You were not given a word to go. You were waiting patiently. But, once again, only apathy.

You heard Sevika’s heavy boot squeak against the floor and time seemed to slow. You knew her fist was coming for you; it had to be. You quickly ducked and kicked your foot out. Hard. It hit Sevika’s shin, and she stumbled. You heard her heavy boots hitting the floor. You followed the noise. You swung your fist out and it hit Sevika. You thought maybe her cheek. Her response was one you expected but had hoped would not happen.

Sevika let out a short yell and quickly became more unpredictable. A fist slammed into your side, and you let out a yelp. Falling onto the hard floor. You scrambled to stand, and another blow came down, her foot to your thigh. You were not giving up. You were not brought up to do that.

You listened closely. Sevika was close. Your hands grabbed, for something, anything. Sevika was in your grasp in seconds, and you brought her towards you. Bad move. You realized too late. Sevika’s hand pressed into the side of your face, she was trying to get you down. You moved, maneuvering away slightly and your teeth caught her hand. You bit down. Sevika did not make a noise.

Instead, she manhandled you down. Your back hit the floor, your head bouncing slightly. You released Sevika’s hand and let out a loud cry. Sevika straddled you. Under any other circumstance you would have been completely and utterly turned on. But something snapped inside of you.

Memories of training came back. How horribly mistreated you were to create what was before Sevika was not leaving anytime soon. Sevika started talking, but you could not hear it. You were frozen under her, eyes wide behind the blindfold. Your breath hitched and the room started to spin. Tears spilled from the corners of your eyes, getting caught in the fabric.

“Get up!” You interrupted her and Silco. “I can’t- Can’t breathe!” You were frantic. You were still unmoving though. Everything was tense, and you could not move.

Sevika, confused, stood up. You ripped the blindfold from your eyes and stood. You looked odd to say the least. Your breathing was rapid, and your eyes looked around frantically. Your bottom lip poked out and you turned away from the two of them. “What’s going on?” Sevika asked first. Silco and her watching as you began to hightail it out of there.

“I’m so sorry.”

You left the office, tears staining your cheeks. You felt so small, having them see you like that. You could barely calm down. You found your room, slammed and locked your door, and placed your back against the wood. You let out a quiet sob. Your eyes shut tight. You did not want to think about what you used to do.

But that was the reason Silco took you in, after all. You would never be able to fully leave your past behind you.

You walked towards your bed and tried to catch your breath. You sucked down air, your fingers gripping and pulling at the hem of your shirt. You sat on the edge of the bed and sighed. You needed an outlet.

You heard your name being called. You, for a moment, thought it was your imagination. Then there was a knock at your door. “It’s me.” Sevika sighed. “Can I come in?”

You had been wanting to get Sevika in your room since you first laid eyes on her. Your jaw clenched and you stood up. You walked towards the door and unlocked it. Your hand grabbed the knob, and you sighed. You opened the door and Sevika looked concerned. “Did you come to drag me back in front of Silco so-”

“No.” Sevika interrupted, “I came to check on you. You were obviously not okay when you left.”

“I'll be okay.” You reassured her. “I’m sorry I bit you. I didn’t- I thought you were going to hurt me-” You paused. “Worse than you already were.” Sevika was stunned. She stood in your doorway. “You can come in, I guess. If you didn’t come to torment me.”

Sevika gave you a look and pushed past you. You closed your door and turned to face her. She placed her right hand on her hip and examined you. Closely. You swallowed hard and your arms hugged your abdomen tightly. Sevika’s gaze did not let up.

“You’re stressed.” Sevika was blunt. “You need something to help you.”

“I know,” You mumbled and shoved your hands into your pockets. “Normally,” Your voice was still low, “to ease the stress, I just ate pu-” You stopped yourself. You pinched the bridge of your nose and groaned. “Sorry.”

“You were able to do that?” Sevika cocked a brow at you. “Eat pussy?”

Heat prickled across your cheeks. You were on fire. “Yes.” You did not even nod. “All of us who were being trained, we had only each other. It was stress relieving, getting intimate, or even sexual with the other women.” Sevika shrugged, “There’s a brothel.”

“No money.” You pulled your pockets out and showed her evidence of your poorness. “I may be rich in strength, but I have no money.”

Sevika shifted. She sighed and looked up, thinking, before her eyes met yours again. “Look,” She started and took a step towards you. “I see how you stare at me. I know you weren’t listening to Silco earlier because you were too busy thinking about me.” You are suddenly a lovesick puppy staring at Sevika, waiting for her next sentence. “And lucky for you, that earlier fight really turned me on.”

She took a step forward and your heart thumped in your chest. “Are you offering what I think you’re offering?” You were stunned, a goofy grin spreading across your face.

Sevika rolled her eyes. “I am. I’ll revoke it though, unlike you, I have money to spend elsewhere.”

“You would not be that cruel, would you?” You pouted. “Come on! I’ll give you the time of your fucking life. I’ve got a lot of practice.” You wiggled your brows at her.

“That better be a promise.” Sevika kicked off her boots and walked towards your bed. She sat down on the edge of it, and you were quick to throw yourself at her feet, wedging yourself between her knees.

“Can I kiss you?” You asked, voice dripping like sweet honey.

“So polite,” Sevika cooed at you. “Because you asked so nicely, I’ll allow it.” She laughed softly. You pushed yourself up slightly and cupped her face. The kiss was soft at first. Until your tongue traced her bottom lip. Sevika let out a low grumble and her mouth opened. Within seconds the kiss was rougher than you had anticipated. Before you could push your tongue into her mouth, she was shoving hers into yours. You moaned loudly and let her explore your mouth.

After a few minutes, you pulled from her lips and peppered gentle kisses down her jaw. Your hands pulled at her clothes, and you pulled away long enough to take her shirt off. You mumbled praises into her skin and Sevika watched you intensely. Her moans and quiet groans echoed inside of your head. It was intoxicating.

Your thumbs rubbed circles on her exposed hips, above her pants. You kissed down her chest and stopped briefly at her breasts, bringing one of her nipples into your mouth. You swirled your tongue around it smiled against Sevika’s skin when her right hand went into your hair. She tugged softly.

“You're gentle, ah,” She sighed, “for someone who had it so rough.”

You did not respond with words. Instead, you took her nipple between your teeth and looked up at Sevika through your lashes. Her eyes did not break contact with yours. You released her and kissed down her stomach. The muscles of her abdomen were so toned, defined… Different from the stomachs you had once kissed.

Your fingers expertly undid the button of her pants and your hands, and you pulled her pants from legs, effortlessly. It was unreal. Really. Your head was spinning again, but for a completely different reason that time. Where to start? You thought to yourself momentarily.

“Don’t get choked up now.” She smirked at you.

You looked up at Sevika with narrowed eyes, but you didn’t respond. Instead, your fingers danced across her thighs and your head burrowed between them. Your lips pressed soft kisses against her skin, your teeth scraping the flesh. Sevika’s hands gripped the sheets. You were being so deliberate and delicate with your motions. Sevika deserved nothing but that.

You thought about leaving marks on her thighs, but that could wait. You needed to taste her. You reached her folds and sucked in air, diving in headfirst. Your fingers spread her lips, and your tongue licked a slow, experimental stripe up her pussy. Sevika let out a low groan and her thighs tensed. Your eyes shut and a hand was immediately in your hair, nails scraping against your scalp.

“Look at me.” Sevika spoke through gritted teeth.

She was proving a point. She was still in control even if you had her this way. Your eyes snapped open as your tongue circled her clit. Sevika’s hips rolled right into your mouth and your hands gripped her thighs tightly. You needed more of her.

Your face was buried deep in her cunt, tongue working overtime. You let out a low rumble, face pressed into her, and Sevika moaned. Your nose bumped her clit, and her hips jerked again. You held her in place, pushing her hips back down on the bed. Until one of your hands slid down her thigh, and right towards her pussy. You kept your eyes on her as your tongue moved to the bundle of nerves and you slid a finger into her entrance.

Your finger curled inside of her and Sevika let out a louder moan. She had been grunting, her breathing getting harder. But you needed her to be louder. You had to hear her. Sevika’s hand held your head in place, keeping you where she wanted you.

You began to suck on her clit and another finger slipped inside her. Once again, you were extremely calculated with your movements. You wanted her to feel good. It was not enough, the position you were in. You threw her thigh over your shoulder and pushed up, knocking Sevika onto her back. You were starting to throb, but you had to take care of Sevika.

“Fuck,” Sevika watched you, her eyes almost closed. She could not look away from you, and you were not looking away from her.

You felt Sevika begin to tense, her whole body was wound tight. Her hips rolled upwards, into your mouth and you let her. You stopped holding her hip down. Sevika’s hand gripped your hair a little lighter and she shoved you further into her pussy. She was close and you were not letting up.

Your tongue swirled around her clit again and you felt her spasm around your fingers. You picked up your pace and smiled against Sevika. Her whole body began to shake, and her eyes shut tight. You did not look away.

Her face contorted with ecstasy and bliss. Sevika threw her head back and you began to slow your movements. You pulled your fingers from her, but you did not pull away from her completely. She still had a grip on you. So, you continued to lick and suck. Once her hand fell from your head you pulled back and rested your cheek on her thigh.

“You’re beautiful.” You watched her, taking everything in. Sevika did respond with words. She swallowed hard and sat up, a groan leaving her lips. “Sevika?” You did not remove yourself from her legs. Sevika hummed and you continued. “Thank you, I feel better now.”

Sevika leaned down and cocked her head at you. “Did you just thank me?” You nodded and smiled wider. “You’re bizarre.”

“I get that a lot, really.” You pushed back and sat on your butt. “Well,” You clicked your tongue. “I gotta take care of myself now, if you wanted to leave-”

“I think,” Sevika interrupted you, “that you deserve something in return. I’ve been wanting to get between your thighs since you arrived.”

It was the beginning of a long night, and you could not wait to see what was in store for you and Sevika.

#arcane smut #sevika arcane #arcane sevika #sevika #sevika smut #sevika x reader #sevika x you #x reader

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ryrywrites · 10 months ago

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Criminal Minds P Links

(divider creds: @cafekitsune)

minors, do not interact. the links below contain porn and graphic nudity. you are responsible for your own media consumption, understanding that the links below contain porn and should not be opened in public. I will block minors who interact.

A/N: The people have spoken! Criminal Minds P links has won the vote, Bridgerton came in a very close second. I was surprised that Criminal Minds won, this was so much fun to make. Spencer's links were so fucking hard to find. BTW happy early 4th of July, for those of you who celebrate! (🎵 I'm proud to be an American 🦅🇺🇸🎵) AND THANK YOU GUYS FOR 100 FOLLOWERS? WHAT THE FUCKKK???? Thank you, hotties! I'm gonna put up a new poll very soon, I'll keep you posted. Anyways, thank you, I luv you, gimme a kiss. Okay, Enjoy!

𝑺𝒑𝒆𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒓 𝑹𝒆𝒊𝒅

❃ He loves being able to fuck your throat

❃ Spence can be such a tease

❃ First time together, you take control

❃ post-prison Reid gets aggressive when you try to take control (tw: slapping)

𝑨𝒂𝒓𝒐𝒏 𝑯𝒐𝒕𝒄𝒉𝒏𝒆𝒓

❃ Rough ass pounding while watching TV after a long case

❃ He's a literal giant

❃ Hotch will punish you if he finds out you took care of yourself while he was away

❃ you're just a toy for him to use

𝑫𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒌 𝑴𝒐𝒓𝒈𝒂𝒏

❃ He had you shaking all night

❃ you're folded like a lawn chair while he pounds you

❃ you're so tight but you take him so well

❃ he loves it when you wear lingerie for him

𝑳𝒖𝒌𝒆 𝑨𝒍𝒗𝒆𝒛

❃ Luke loves controlling missionary

❃ He's such a giver

❃ You get a call about a case but that doesn't stop Luke

❃ He thinks it's so sexy, watching you fuck yourself on his cock

𝑴𝒂𝒕𝒕 𝑺𝒊𝒎𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒔

❃ He'll pull your hair so hard, you'll get a migraine

❃ A shower after a long day at work gets a happy ending

❃ His stamina never runs out

❃ you're oiled up and bouncing on his cock

𝑬𝒎𝒊𝒍𝒚 𝑷𝒓𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒔𝒔

❃ fucking in the office once everyone's gone home

❃ Emily loves when you pull her hair while she licks your clit

❃ She allows you to record but only this once

❃ Your first time together was so intimate and loving

𝑷𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒍𝒐𝒑𝒆 𝑮𝒂𝒓𝒄𝒊𝒂

❃ You and Pen having rough sex all night

❃ You two thrive off of each other's pleasure

❃ Penelope got a tongue piercing just for this

❃ This time, Penelope wants to see how you like the strap

𝑱𝒆𝒏𝒏𝒊𝒇𝒆𝒓 𝑱𝒂𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒖

❃ JJ loves to see you like this

❃ JJ loves being on top

❃ perfect three-way between you, JJ, and Will

❃ JJ with a strap goes crazy

769 notes · View notes

michanvalentine · 1 month ago

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I was mentioned in a pro-Ascendant Astarion post with this quote: "Astarion does not have a well-developed sense of self, and by default, he also lacks many of the skills that a well-adjusted adult should possess." This is the post it’s taken from: click me!

No problem at all—it's public, and I don’t see why anyone shouldn’t reference it. Naturally, the post was in opposition to that statement—generally speaking, I mean—but that’s fine too. Everyone has their own opinion and is free to express it. That’s not the point of my upcoming ramble! xD

It’s just that rereading my own words got me thinking more deeply about the topic and made me want to explore it further.

Now, I’m not a psychologist, but I did study psychology. I took several exams at university and I actually did pretty well, lol. I didn’t complete my studies because life took me elsewhere—most importantly, my daughter was born—but the general knowledge I gained from psychology still follows me in everything I do every day.

So it’s second nature for me to analyze characters from the media I consume through that lens—Astarion included. Of course, this is just my perspective; I can’t say for certain whether the developers intended this for his character or whether they did specific research into his psychological development.

That said, today I feel like going off on a little tangent about this beautiful science. Still in reference to that heart-stealing vampire spawn that I’m aaaaabsolutely not obsessed with.

Let me also add a disclaimer. The concepts mentioned are just examples and cannot be applied literally, as every person is different and reacts differently to situations and stimuli. Likewise, the brain is plastic—neural connections change and adapt, and there is almost never a fixed or definitive condition. Above all, I’m not making any kind of diagnosis! That’s not within my competence! Keep these ideas well in mind!

So, why do I say that Astarion doesn’t have a well-developed sense of self? Let’s take it step by step and talk a little about the concept of the "self". I'm copy-pasting something from another post, lol. Rewriting it from scratch is too much work! xP

The self is quite a complex concept with many facets. Briefly put, it’s shaped by various internal and external factors and reflects a conscious image of "me." In psychology, it’s key to building the Ego of an individual—the capacity to act, understand, organize, and interpret experiences. The Ego provides a sense of uniqueness, coherence, and personal continuity since the self encompasses many "faces." All this forms the personality of an individual, which naturally develops (and changes) throughout life.

Particular attention in the formation of the self is given to sensitive periods, such as early childhood. The self determines the level of self-esteem based on an individual’s assessment of their worth and competence in the characteristics they attribute to themselves (Real Self), their future aspirations (Ideal Self), and what they want to avoid (Feared Selves). The greater the discrepancy between these aspects, the lower the level of self-esteem. Social support and approval, as well as competence in domains deemed important to the self, obviously contribute to perceiving oneself as a person of value.

Astarion, as we know, has had his sense of self fundamentally undermined. For him, the world is divided between those who have power and those who don’t, with the former always being the "winners" in his eyes. The magistrate he once was is long dead, along with his moral compass and the life he used to live—especially after 200 years of servitude to Cazador.

As vampire spawn, akin to a newborn in some respects, Astarion learned to exist solely within Cazador’s world, revolving around Cazador, for Cazador.

There are lines of dialogue within the game that highlight this in a painful and terrifying way. For example, when Tav/Durge directly confronts Cazador, or when Cazador ends up on his knees in front of Astarion after one of his brothers or sisters dies during the ritual. Cazador says: “He [Astarion] is afraid. He’s afraid because all he has ever knows is you and me. And without us, he is nothing.” Or: “And then? What will you be without me? A shade? A specrte in the shadows, devoid of all purpose.”

It’s a terrible thing, but it’s true. Cazador represents everything—Astarion’s entire world—and when he dies, he leaves behind a void that’s even more frightening. And let’s not forget that, in the real world, it takes very little to completely erase a person—and two hundred years in the hands of an abuser is an overwhelming amount of time, a detail that too often gets underestimated or completely forgotten.

The whole matter becomes even more disturbing and painful when Cazador suggests that without Tav/Durge, Astarion would have come crawling back to him with his tail between his legs. To his fucking tormentor. And sadly, it's a painful concept because it really happens in real life—when you have nothing and no one, when you have no means of your own and are completely dependent on another person, no matter how terrifying they are. Cazador is certain that Astarion will return to him, even if it means dying. And it's a concept with a devastating impact.

So Cazador was the domineering father figure, and vampire society functions under strict rules handed down by vampire lords. In this hostile context, without any room for self-expression or choice, Astarion developed a fragmented and damaged self-image. Constantly belittled by Cazador as an individual (small, weak, useless, incapable, all words he uses in the game), always pitted against his brothers and sisters, and degraded from a magistrate to a prostitute (this is important because it’s the only skill—or "talent," as he calls it himself—that Astarion believes gives him any value or power, forming the basis for his self-image). It’s easy to imagine just how high his self-esteem must be, right? Most importantly, he never developed the skills to navigate life as a free individual—at least not in a healthy way.

Good Lord, he thinks that in order to receive support, he has to sell himself to Tav/Durge and offer his sexual services—otherwise, he has no hope of survival! And that’s why I say he doesn’t possess all the skills of a well-adjusted adult. Other glaring examples of this—so glaring they hit you like a punch in the eye—are his inability to say no and to recognize his own limits. And shall we talk about the infamous question: What do you want? The first time, he deflects, and essentially gives the answer the player wants to hear. The second time, he states it plainly: he doesn't know. He doesn't know how to make decisions, he hasn’t done it in 200 years, and the very idea terrifies him to his core. These are all skills that a well-balanced person possesses—let’s not kid ourselves.

Like any mature and well-balanced adult, one knows how to recognize their feelings, define them, communicate them, and most importantly, not fear them. Astarion, on the other hand, is unable—after 200 years of pure shit—to understand what he feels for Tav/Durge, and he won’t be able to until the end of the Pale Elf’s quest. “I don’t know—but isn’t it nice, not to know? You’re not a target, nor a victim, not just one night it's better to forget. But then... whatever in the world could you be?”

So, even if reluctantly (and despite his fear), he ends up leaning on Tav/Durge. He needs a guiding figure to help him figure out what to do because making decisions and acting independently don’t come naturally to him. Especially outside of his talents, sex and survival. He needs to be rehabilitated, re-educated, and to achieve this, he requires a safe and healthy environment where he can experiment and grow, perhaps developing other faces of the self on which to base a new evaluation. Like, I'm not just a slave or a whore: but I'm also a companion, a friend, a lover, a hero and I'm able to listen, to help, to learn, to collaborate, etc.

And let’s not forget that when the fateful confrontation with Cazador is brought up, Astarion explicitly asks Tav/Durge for help. “I need to take the fight to him. And I need you to help me,” he says. How to help him—whether to ascend or not—is up to the player and how they choose to play. But the fact remains: Astarion needs support.

Meanwhile let’s take a look at some of the consequences of low self-esteem:

Difficulty opening up in social settings and communicating one's emotions and needs

Extreme self-criticism

Devaluing or ignoring one’s own qualities

Tendency to constantly apologize and feel guilty for things that are not actually one's responsibility

Tendency to appease others due to perceiving oneself as inferior to one’s peers

Use of negative words to describe oneself

Difficulty making decisions and maintaining personal goals over time

Negative and self-blaming internal dialogue

Belief that success is due to luck, with difficulty attributing accomplishments to oneself

Not believing compliments that are given to them

And now, let’s look at the most common causes for the development of low self-esteem:

Being raised by extremely critical and demanding parents

Being heavily devalued by parents or other authority figures

Being ignored or ridiculed during childhood

Being a victim of physical, sexual, or psychological abuse

Achieving poor academic results

Experiencing episodes of bullying or mistreatment in the workplace

Suffering a financial collapse or a significant breakup

Being subjected to a prolonged period of stress

Suffering from a chronic and persistent medical condition

Suffering from psychological disorders (e.g., anxiety or depression)

Does this remind you of something? Or maybe someone in particular? Does that person, by any chance, have red eyes and pointed teeth?

Naturally, these are just examples, and everything varies depending on the individual, but I believe these points still manage to convey the concept.

They especially give the idea of how much events—and especially the context in which we live—impact our psyche. For example, thanks to neuroscience and increasingly detailed brain imaging, we know that brain areas change according to the factors mentioned above; they train like muscles, so to speak, becoming larger and more reactive every time they are activated.

So, if someone is subjected to chronic stress, the brain areas responsible for managing it will become easily activated, bringing with them a whole series of consequences that affect performance, behavior, perception, thinking, and so on.

Likewise, the more the “right” areas of the brain are activated, the more the brain itself will develop in a healthy and balanced way, forming neural connections that support the tools (perception, thinking, etc) mentioned above.

Meanwhile, other areas—such as those related to stress responses—will remain small and more difficult to activate. (Obviously, brain areas don’t literally “grow” or “shrink” in size, but the connections between neurons (synapses) are strengthened or weakened depending on how much they’re used. This is a principle known as “neural plasticity”: what you use becomes reinforced, what you neglect becomes weaker.)

A curiosity: even our mood influences how we perceive people and the world around us—and consequently, our thoughts and impressions too! xD

This image is heartbreaking, because these brains belong to two three-year-old children—and the differences are significant.

The brain on the right is missing key areas that are present in the one on the left. These missing parts impact the abilities of the child with the smaller brain:

this child will likely be less intelligent as an adult compared to the one with the larger brain,

will be less capable of empathizing with others,

and will be at higher risk of becoming addicted to drugs and involved in violent crimes.

Additionally, the child with the smaller brain is more likely to remain unemployed and dependent on social services, and may develop mental health issues or other serious health problems.

The large difference in size and development between these two brains is not due to illness or injury, but rather to how the two children were treated by their mothers.

The child with the larger, more developed brain was loved by their mother, who was consistently present and attentive to their needs. The child with the smaller brain, on the other hand, was neglected and abused. It is precisely this difference in treatment that explains why one child's brain developed fully while the other’s did not.

Of course, our favorite vampire spawn isn’t a developing child—but the point is that certain environments and experiences have a profound impact and shape many aspects of our lives, making us more or less equipped to face challenges.

At this point, I’d like to focus a bit on the reasoning process in general. It’s easy to believe that when humans think, make decisions, and reflect on a problem or task, they do so in the most rational way possible. And that’s where we go wrong! First of all, the cerebral cortex — the part of the brain responsible for complex cognitive functions such as thinking, awareness, memory, attention, and language — is located in the upper region of the brain. Most stimuli, in order to reach the cortex, must pass through all the lower areas of the brain, which often trigger behavioral responses even before the stimulus reaches rational thought. For example, the activation of the sympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for danger responses. A silly example: how many times have we jumped out of our skin before realizing that the loud, scary noise was just a window slamming shut? First comes the fear response, then the evaluation of the stimulus follows.

As if that weren’t enough, the brain plays other little tricks on us — without us even being aware of it — because that sneaky thing does a whole lot on its own, especially when it comes to thinking and making decisions.

So... Astarion has a very limited perspective—mostly the one offered by Cazador. As we said earlier, the world is divided into those who have power and those who suffer it. Period. But we all know that in between there are infinite shades of gray, and that can’t be denied. In the same way, Astarion believes that Tav/Durge is the exception to the rule—the only kind person in the world, the one and only for him. But as much as it flatters our ego to hear that, we know very well that no one is that special. It’s always Astarion’s perspective that’s extremely limited. And in fact, here too, Tav/Durge has the opportunity to broaden his view, to point out that the world is full of kind people who would care for him if only he opened himself up and showed kindness in return. This narrow way of thinking and seeing things, this resistance to noticing alternatives, fits perfectly into the category of cognitive biases.

Let’s start with the premise that the human brain needs to be both effective and efficient. That means reaching a result in the shortest time and using the fewest resources. Therefore: when we think and make decisions, we don’t always do so rationally. We use heuristics—mental shortcuts—often following patterns we've used before. A silly example: if I have to cook a dish I’ve made a hundred times, I don’t sit down to rethink how and why I should cook it—I just switch off my brain and do it the way I’ve always done. Many heuristics are good and useful—others, not so much. And when they fall into the latter category, they become biases.

There are many types, but let’s look at one that we all, even us Astarion fans, share. xD Confirmation Bias!

Confirmation bias manifests when we tend to search for, interpret, or remember information that supports our pre-existing beliefs, ignoring anything that contradicts them or isn’t completely aligned.

Once a certain mental imprint forms, new experiences only deepen that groove, without any willingness to explore other interpretative modes—in fact, they tend to further crystallize internal beliefs.

We can say that the person is cherry-picking—in a complex set of data and information, they pick out only what resonates with a belief they already hold, which, in some way, is convenient for them.

The reason is easy to see: if I don’t challenge a belief—even if it’s irrational—I’ll save time, create less friction, and reduce internal and external resistance to a given situation.

Because confirmation bias shows up when a person selects only the evidence that supports their point of view, it easily becomes a self-sustaining system, keeping them locked in an interpretive and experiential microcosm that risks becoming increasingly stifling—a self-built prison.

Astarion is stuck on tracks he’s known inside and out for centuries, forcibly carved into his mind—and for him, it’s all too easy to filter everything through that lens. And this cuts him off from a myriad of possibilities, in a completely unconscious way. It’s like throwing a wrench in your own gears. So Tav/Durge represents an opening to a different value system, one that could replace or at least expand our vampire spawn’s worldview. Not without resistance, of course—those brain connections will get you!

So, to conclude, let’s go back to the beginning and to the statement in question.

"Astarion does not have a well-developed sense of self, and by default, he also lacks many of the skills that a well-adjusted adult should possess."

Yes, maybe out of context it might sound bad. I certainly don’t see Astarion as half a man, incapable of thinking or choosing for himself. But I do recognize that he has serious vulnerabilities that need to be treated with care and taken into account. Not when we're playing—when we play, we do what we like and have fun—but when we analyze him as a character. When Astarion, at the end of the Pale Elf quest, in the good ending, thanks us for saving him from himself, what he means, in my opinion, is exactly this: thank you for supporting me when my vulnerabilities, my fears, my blind spots, and my narrow perspective were getting the best of me. Because, let’s be honest, Astarion’s story is also about this—about rediscovery, about learning to live again, about changing, improving, growing, developing relationships, new abilities and skills. Not as a rogue or as a vampire, or within game mechanics—but as a person.

The point is: Astarion has come out of a horrific situation, one that has to have left marks, wounds, infected pus festering beneath the skin. A situation that never allowed him to understand what he liked, what he wanted, who he really was—simply because he couldn’t express himself, couldn’t think about his own needs, couldn’t say no. Couldn’t develop his sense of self in peace and safety.

A situation that left him unable to face the world and the people in it in a healthy way, unable to identify and express his own feelings, unable to say that damn "no" or to make choices. To decide, yes. And in fact, every time he’s asked what he wants to do, his answers are vague—or he says he doesn’t know, or admits that he’s afraid of those damn choices. He’s afraid of freedom, of consequences, and of everything else beyond the four things he knows—the four fucking things Cazador drilled into him, all around power and control.

And I’m really supposed to believe that the one choice he’s absolutely sure about is Ascension? Hell no. Just like he's not sure he doesn't want to ascend!

References

Rogers, C. R. (1961). On Becoming a Person: A Therapist's View of Psychotherapy. Houghton Mifflin. → A foundational text on the concept of the self, self-actualization, and congruence between real and ideal self.

Winnicott, D. W. (1964). The Child, the Family, and the Outside World. Penguin Books. → Explores the importance of a safe environment in the healthy development of the self.

Bowlby, J. (1969–1980). Attachment and Loss (Vols. 1–3). Basic Books. → Describes how early attachment figures shape our internal working models and sense of security.

Erikson, E. H. (1950). Childhood and Society. W. W. Norton & Company. → Introduces the theory of psychosocial development across the lifespan.

Herman, J. L. (1992). Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence—From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror. Basic Books. → Explains complex trauma, victim-perpetrator dynamics, and the long-term effects of abuse.

van der Kolk, B. A. (2014). The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma. Viking. → Offers neuroscientific insight into how trauma reshapes the brain and affects emotional regulation.

Siegel, D. J. (2010). The Mindful Brain: Reflection and Attunement in the Cultivation of Well-Being. W. W. Norton & Company. → Discusses neuroplasticity, integration, and the development of a coherent sense of self.

Kahneman, D. (2011). Thinking, Fast and Slow. Farrar, Straus and Giroux. → A deep dive into heuristics, decision-making, and cognitive biases like confirmation bias.

Malaguti, E., & Morganti, P. (2014). Psychotraumatology: An Integrated Model for Trauma Treatment. (Translated from the Italian). FrancoAngeli. → Addresses the psychological and neurological consequences of prolonged trauma.

#astarion #astarion ancunin #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #baldurs gate #astarion bg3 #baldurs gate 3 astarion #baldur's gate astarion

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hepbaestus · 20 days ago

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I wish fic writers would get the same amount of support and admiration as fan artists do. (Long rant incoming and no I'm not even going to put it under a read more because it would be skipped over if it was.)

This might sound biased, coming from someone who posts fics and does not have a lick to talent when it comes to art, but just, please, read and try to understand.

It fucking sucks to see something that two different people have spent hours working on and only one gets the attention it rightly deserves because there's no stigma of it being "creepy" or "perverted" like fanfiction does and as publicly too.

I do understand that this will likely never change and that I'll have to get used to it as a fic writer, but, the fact that I'm having to 'get over it' because that's just how it is in fandom-spaces sucks. It shouldn't be like that, it's demoralising, and frankly off-putting. It makes me, and likely others who won't publicly say it, not want to post our written works.

Like there are times where people are literally spending hours and hours planning, drafting, proofreading and then correctly tagging a fic only for it to get no recognition or more critique than adoration. Whereas a fan artist can spend maybe a couple of hours on what they'll call a doodle and get all the praise. This isn't to bash any fan artists because goddamn I know y'all love what you do (and rightly so) but it feels like a stake to heart seeing two sides of the same coin being treated with completely different levels of respect.

Like I also understand that, with how people's attention spans are lessening, that not everyone is bothered or able to read something that's 5k+ (or even 1k+) words and I get it, but also? Give it a chance? You might, now stick with me here, actually like what you read. I know. Shocker.

And, then, if you do actually read something someone has kindly put out into the world for free, don't put comments in your bookmarks or the comments section stating how you "wish it was written different" or "from another character's pov" or when you decided to drop the fic. The author does not want to know when you dropped their fic. Just move the fuck on. If you want it a certain way so much, fucking write it yourself (or if the writer has commissions open, commission them like you would an artist). It is rude to leave comments like this and so incredibly disheartening for the writer of that fic to see such comments. If you have a critique about a fic, privately talk to your friends in the same fandom as you about it or if you don't have that put it in a private discord or something. Unless the author has explictly stated that they would like critiques, which is when you would comment some critiques if you had any, you do not need to leave unwarranted critiques. It is rude and unnecessary.

I could share screenshots of people who leave unwarranted critiques to fics in their comments section or bookmark comments, but because I'm a kind individual who frankly cannot be bothered to compile several tumblr posts of solely images, I'm not. But do know that we do see every comment under our works and saying "oh I didn't think you'd see it" is not a fucking excuse. People who make fan creations often look into their comments to see people's reactions, in hopes of having spread the joy or similar emotion they had when writing or drawing their piece.

And content creators who review fan art with praise and then immediately make fun of fic writers, I despise you. Genuinely. The fact that you think it's okay to uplift one part of your creative audience while not doing such with the other is disgusting. I do understand that there are boundaries that a person will have towards both forms of media but completely writing off one form of fan creation while entertaining the other is genuinely one of the most saddening things. It creates a further divide between these two sides of fan creation and reinforces people's mean attitudes towards fanfic writers simply because how they express their love for a piece of media is not easily viewed. There are, obviously creators who do acknowledge but stay away from fanfiction and I respect that; it's about actively going into those spaces to criticise and, in some cases, bully, those writers about something they're passionate about. If you're that insistent on leaving a negative comment on something, please, for the love of everything get a fucking life.

This is a long winded way of saying respect people who make fan content because, 99% of the time, they're doing it for free and for their own entertainment.

#hep rants #fandom #fandom culture #fandom etiquette #fandom things #fanfiction #just give us a chance you know #the paragraph about content creators was written when jack manifold did a fan art video or something and #it reminded me of CC's general thoughts on fanfics so that's also there for you to read if you want to :)#i've had this in my drafts for *months*. slowly being added to when i see shit like this #its an age old thing that'll likely never change because theres not really anyone advocating for fanfiction as much as people do for fanart #I first wrote this in August last year. That's how long this shit has been brewing

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randomishnickname · 1 month ago

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I'm always amazed and disturbed by how much USA trivia, cultural artifacts and idioms i know and recognize. I know what a keg stand is, i know what the "freshman fifteens" are, i know what a freshman is and what AP classes are. I know what AAVE means, i know you can get pancakes at an "IHOP", i know what the US supreme court does and who AOC is. I know what Stonewall was and the Montgomery bus boycotts were, i know what "drinking the kool-aid" and what SoCal means, i know the "Florida man" meme and several thousand other details.

And like, on one hand i'm proud of myself, because all of this i had to learn and remember, without ever encountering it in my daily life. And it's fun to master a foreign language, it's fun to be knowledgeable in another culture. I like to watch a US movie or TV show and go "hey, i know what this reference means".

On the other hand, the USA are not a country i intend on visiting, to be honest it's not even a culture i particularly like or admire. I'll never set foot in an IHOP. And yet i know so, so much more about the USA, US politics and US culture than i know about my neighbouring countries, let alone countries in other parts of the world. If I'm honest with myself, i probably even know more about US culture and politics than about my own two countries, which is kinda shameful.

And it's partly my fault for using tumblr so heavily for the last 8 years, a social media platform dominated by USAmericans, and for not taking more care in watching TV shows, political shows and movies from other countries (or from my own countries). I should do more, take more care, not always chose the easy, default route.

But in wide parts of the internet (our global "home"), where we interact via the "global language" english, there's such an implicit understanding that you have to be fluent in US culture in order to keep up. We want to be able to partake, to exchange, to fangirl about the same TV shows or understand discussions about politics. And US media dominates the planet by such a wide, wide margin - it's a common ground.

No USAmerican is ever surprised by how well i know US culture. It's a matter of course. It's expected. A majority of non-USAmerican here on this platform has put the same work in as i have and are very knowledgeable of US stuff as a result. That's just the default. The labor that goes into learning all of those US cultural artifacts is rendered widely invisible as a result.

And honestly, how are we to fight back against a cultural imperialism that is so deeply entrenched... I wouldn't know where to even start. I like being able to exchange with so many people without being divided by language barriers, I feel no patriotic pride in watching movies from my own countries. But i hate and resent that extreme power imbalance, those implicit expectations, the lack of acknowledgment or even awareness about the work people from other countries put into learning and understanding US culture.

Fucking IHOP, man. Why do i even know what an IHOP is. Why do so many of us know what an IHOP is.

#imperialism #my posts #personal #us imperialism

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xxghouliexx · 8 months ago

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Something I have noticed within the many social media areas of the community including but not limited to tumblr, discord, reddit, etc is that there seems to be a big obsession on dividing everyone.

-Talking down upon or hating what is seen as the stereotypical regressor (people that like pastels, pretty dresses, feminine etc)

-Talking down upon or hating more masculine regressors whether male, female, trans or otherwise. Because they don't fit into some stupid box.

-Tall, short, skinny, fat, black, Asian, European etc whatever it is some part of the community will say that isn't the 'true' way to regress.

I've seen posts of people complaining that there is an oversaturation of whatever group of regressors. I've seen people complaining about minors that regress, I've seen people complaining that adults regress. There's constant streams of drama going on.

There's just so much drama. And I feel bad. I feel bad for the pastel girly regressors that people are mad at because they're the known regressor 'aethestic'. As if those individuals are not allowed to post so that others don't feel bad for not looking or being like them. As if they are the route cause of every issue within the community. I personally feel like that's an unfair expectation on them to have to hide who they are just to appease random strangers.

That sentiment goes out to every different 'type' of regressor. No one should have to explain or hide away themselves just because someone else is mad that they portray their regression in a way that does not conform to what they want regression to look like.

It feels like people seem to forget that out of the many things that make us different there is one thing that unites us.

We regress for whatever reason. Whether it's trauma related, a way to relieve stress or simply for fun. Regression is something we all have in common.

Everyone is valid.

Whether you're a girl,boy, trans or other gender.

Whether you're white, black, Asian or any other nationality, or colour of skin.

Whether you like bugs, cars and dirt, or pretty dresses, bows, barbie and pastels. Or if you're like myself and prefer more darker, macabre things.

I could go on and on about differences, but I'd be here all day.

I would like to see everyone being able to be friendly and if that's not possible then civil to each other at least.

To uplift EVERYONE and ANYONE within the community.

Enjoy what makes everyone unique and the same.

I know this isn't going to fix everything and I understand that there will be people that think I'm chatting out my butt.

But for the people that agree, please share to show that you are here for every type of regressor and your blog is a safe place.

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siddyyyyyyyy · 4 months ago

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Hello, how are you? Can I ask, in which Jason finds a fissure and enters it without thinking and comes out straight into a sculpture shop, where Reader is the one who creates them (Reader creates a crush and sees Jason as a muse), but in Reader's universe it is an ancient time, even though it is in the same year as Jason's universe, (reader flirts awkwardly)? Anguished ending? And sorry for being long, I got very happy.

You Are My Muse

Jason Todd x Reader

wc: 2.3 K summary: Jason finds his way to you (through accident) warnings: sassy jason, no y/n used, lore, fluff, reader's universe is the same as ours but without brainrot, angst a/n: (divider: @animatedglittergraphics-n-more) kind of fucked up the flirting part, but I still hope you enjoy....... (i'm so sorry this took so long)

»Why‘s my nose so big?«

»It‘s not!«

»Okay, so why do I feel insecure now?« It‘s the first thing Jason notices once he sees a head sculpture of himself, staring right back at it. His nose doesn‘t look that big, he just doesn‘t want to admit that this looks exactly like him.

And now that he got here, he can‘t escape. Maybe, walking through a mysterious fissure, in the middle of his walk, wasn‘t his best decision, but he believes he had worse. Now, he is stuck in some sort of art studio with countless of sculptures, sketches and your so-called 'drafts‘ sitting around.

You were surprised at first, scared even. Of course you would be, if your own creation — suddenly a breathing human-being — comes out of the shadow. Everyone else would be scared too. But now, after double checking that you aren‘t dreaming, you are talking to him and start to grow frustrated. You didn‘t think you created such confident, even cocky, person. Even if it doesn‘t come off as insulting, it starts to make you annoyed.

»Okay, how about you try to make one yourself? It takes a lot of time to master such art, let alone get the material for it.« He cocks his head, taking in the other creations around the big room; ignoring your challenge.

»Is that my brother— is that Dick?«

Jason gestures at one head sculpture not too far away from the both of you, making you turn your attention to it as well.

»Oh, yes. I also have your whole family here, but… as you see, I like creating you the most.« You become lightly flustered at the end. He doesn‘t notice, instead, he keeps staring at the creations.

»How‘d you manage to do that? How do you even know us?« This question makes you pause, but you quickly compose yourself.

»I… created you? I‘m your creator?« You answer back, being unsure yourself. But it makes sense that he is confused. So are you.

»What do you mean ‚created‘? What the hell is this?«

»My sculpture shop.«

»Yeah, but… okay, let me calm down for a minute.« Jason sits down at one of the stools and takes a deep breath, staring around your creations a little longer. It‘s definitely well-made and detailled, and his brain is finally starting to catch up.

»I can make you… a hot chocolate, if you‘re stressed.«

He glances back at you, snapping out of his thoughts and processes your offer. Jason shrugs, eventually leaving the decision up to you. You take his silent shrug as a yes and exit the room to make him something warm to drink.

Turns out, Jason loves hot chocolate. Although you‘re not sure if he was just thirsty or genuinely likes it, or was simply stress drinking. Either way, he complimented it before being seemingly more calm about the situation.

You settled him inside your apartment, living with him together from now on. It wasn‘t long until Jason finally notices the subtle differences in your universe. In here, there are no phones, no social media and most importantly, no electricity. Somehow, you still speak his language and even use those stupid slangs his younger brother Tim uses to annoy him.

»What do you mean you ‘don‘t know what gossip girls are‘? It‘s like...« my favourite show, he wants to say, but holds back, »The best piece of media!« Jason manages out, still bewildered that someone like you has no clue about such a show.

You simply shrug with your shoulders, keeping your confused gaze on him. He eventually gives up, waving it off with a huff.

»We have some catch up to do once we get back to my universe.«

Since you made him settle in the next room to yours, and have thin walls, you can hear about almost everything. The sheets rustles to the soft cries that are heard from his room after a nightmare. It doesn‘t seem like he wants to talk about it as well, after attempting to approach him about it one day. You respect his boundaries, that he doesn‘t want to share his vulnerable side, especially since you don‘t each other that well yet. Ironic, considering he is pratically your own creation among many others.

Sighing out, you exit your bedroom and make a sweet tea for the both of you.

Soft knocks are heard from the other side of his door, making him still in his bed. Jason wipes the silent tears off his cheeks, already irritated about the interruption. Nevertheless, he opens his door and blinks a few times at you.

There you stand, two mugs of tea that are steaming hot. The sweet scent reaches his nose, making him less annoyed.

»I told you not to bother.« He mumbles out, running a hand though his sweaty locks, but feels reluctant to close the door again.

»Still… at least let me make you less stressed,« you shrug, carefully saying your next words, »I can hear everything in my room anyway...«

Jason pauses before he nods and takes one of the hot mugs from you. You can make out the faintest smile on his face, deciding to ignore it and take a sip of your tea.

Nights like these evolved into laying next to each other in comfortable silence or sharing the story of his previous nightmare. It was one the things Jason cherished, while being stuck in this universe. He didn‘t go out as much in this universe, not daring to see any more of the differences between your universe and his.

He often enjoys his time at your art studio or even cooks something up in your kitchen out of boredom. Without any entertainment, he has to do something without his beloved phone and books. That‘s why he usually hangs out with your sculptures and sometimes even makes some small ones himself. You thought him an easy technique to sculpt small stuff and he has been trying to master it since then. There‘s already a wobbly symbol of his second persona – Red Hood. He even painted it the according colour and makes sure it stays next to his head sculpture.

You notice the big effort he puts into his small creations, smiling lightly to yourself whenever you spot another one of his silly works. While he mostly gets to bore himself all day, you work in your studio and go about your day, collecting more material and ideas. Often times than not, Jason simply watches you work, admiring the way you casually sculpt one of his brothers as if it‘s the most normal thing on earth. He still needs to get a grasp on the technique of it all, so far it‘s all magic to him.

»How do you do all that without any reference?« Jason wonders from his stool on the other side of the studio, head tilted to one side.

»I do have some… look.«

You shrug and step up to your work desk, fishing out a larger sketchbook and hand it to him. »It‘s all there.«

He grabs the sketchbook and sits back down on his spot, starting to flip through the pages. His eyes study the flawlessly drawn faces and poses of each person, recognising them right away.

There‘s Damian taking care of animals and training with his Katana, or Dick doing crazy acrobatics.

Each page reveals new poses and facial expressions, but what he notices is the sheer amount of his sketched faces. He doesn‘t speak up about it yet, continuing to look through them. The next page shows him, in a full body pose, revealing his scarred skin and muscles on full display. Jason clears his throat and shifts in his seat, taking in further details of it. The autopsy scar, clear as day, making him suddenly very self-conscious about it. After flipping to the next page, he is greeted with yet another naked portait of himself, this time striking a pose that emphasizes his muscles. Finally, he decides to get up and spook you.

»What‘s this? Just references?« He comes up behind you, his deep voice ringing just behind your ear. You glance behind your shoulder, spotting the sketches in his hands. Your face drops briefly before composing yourself, letting out a light chuckle.

»Oh, this? Yeah, just references. Nothing else, just… admiring your pretty body.« Now it‘s Jason‘s turn to be caught off guard for a second. His cheeks flush, but he stays composed.

»Yeah? Well, then… if it‘s just references of me and my pretty body...« He teases back, smirk playing on his lips as he steps off.

You try to think of how to flirt more with him, even if it means getting to say stupid stuff and teasing each other like idiots. So, you step off your current creation and disappear behind a curtain, where the bigger scluptures sit around. You carefully put one out into the studio, making sure not to accidentally trip and shatter it into pieces as you do.

The sculpture is Jason, body naked and striking the same pose as the last sketch. His muscles look tense and well defined, his scars looking more prominent in the light. Jason pauses and takes in the copy of himself, naked on full display and looking gorgeous. Even better than the real thing, he thinks.

You cross your arms proudly and take in his reaction, a smirk on your face as you present it to him.

Finally, he reacts and clears his throat, nodding in acknowledgement.

»No need to show off, nerd...« He mumbles out, clearly flustered over the statue.

A week went by and Jason grows frustrated over the fact that he can‘t seem to find a way back to his own home. He desperately tried to search for some fissure in your studio which he came through in the first place, but he couldn‘t find it. You can feel the frustrated energy in your whole apartment, being able to grasp onto it. Jason stands off the couch, walking into the kitchen to cook his mood away. You follow him shortly after, settling against the counter as you watch him prepare the ingredients.

You don‘t speak up yet, waiting for him to start cooking and figure out what he is making. Jason starts to cut up various vegetables, deciding to help him. You grab another cutting board for yourself and get the other paprike from him, starting to slice it up like he does. Jason stays silent as he works, focused on not being too rough on the vegetables and accidentally stab himself in the process.

Eventually, he lays his knife down and gets a pan from one of the shelves, knowing your kitchen like the back of his hand by now. He starts to throw the diced stuff into the pan, putting on the heat on the stove. You add the rest into it, silently following what he‘s doing.

Jason leans his hands on the edge of the counter, waiting for the pan to start heating up. A heavy sigh leaves him, watching how his lids close slowly.

»You know, I don‘t need your help.«

»But I want to.« You answer back with a light smile, hoping to ease the mood. Jason, however, doesn‘t seem to be affeceted much by it. Instead, he finally looks at you, eyes locking with yours. Your expression softens and you give him space, understanding that he is under stress.

Jason bites his inner cheek before he takes a step closer, wrapping you up in a hug; sighing out shakily against your shoulder. You didn‘t expect it but reciprocate the hug, gently caressing his back with your palm. He stays close, lightly swaying you both from side to side and tightens his hold around you.

Jason doesn‘t want to leave. At least not without you. But he won‘t say those words out loud, preffering to keep it to himself.

The vegetables in the pan start sizzling, making him let go of you and return back to cooking. You sigh out softly and stick by his side, continuing to watch him cook a meal for the both of you.

The evening stays cozy between the two of you, eating the warm meal before you settle into your respected rooms.

You shriek up at night, cold sweat running over your back. You jerk up again as you hear something shatter in the next room. Quickly, you scatter to your feet and exit your room, trying to find the cause for the loud sound. Outside, there‘s two white slits staring back at you, making you pause and stay still. Your first instinct is to call for Jason, find safety in his presence, but no words are coming out of your throat.

Luckily, you don‘t have to call him, as he walks out of his bedroom already. Jason also stops once he notices the dark figure in front of you and tenses briefly. Seems like he knows them, considering the way he takes a few steps forward and shields you from the darker figure.

»We have to go home, the portal only lasts for two more minutes.« The unfamiliar figure finally starts, urging Jason back to his ownuniverse. Jason relents, but knows he should follow him back.

»Give me a minute—«

»There‘s no time,« The other person presses, not understanding the reluctance of Jason. But Jason doesn‘t listen and turn to face you, trying to find his words. However, you understand and only stare back at him, already accepting the fate. Finally, Jason takes a deep breath and speaks up, quietly.

»I‘ll see you again, yeah?« With an uneven sigh, he takes a step back and follows his brother, watching how they both disappear into a bright slight out of air.

Panicking, you rush to Jason‘s previous room and hope what you just saw was a werid hallucination. Inside, you are greeted with nothing but his lit lamp light at the nightstand, and the silence of your empty apartment. Scoffing, you sit down at the bed, trying to get along the situation. On his nighstand stands a smaller, ceramic figure. A moon-shaped plate, coloured in a deep red.

a/n: this was so fun to write!! i really liked the idea, i hope i was able to execute it well, thanks for the request

←MASTERLIST

#x reader #dc comics #batfam #batfamily #jason todd #drabble #request #writing requests #masterlist #jason todd x reader #jason todd x you #red hood x reader #red hood x you #jason todd fluff #red hood fluff #red hood angst #jason todd angst #alternate universes #crazy request loved it

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 year ago

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AITA for telling off my sister about watching a kid's show?

💫 for searching!

I (15F) have an older sister, Penn (17F), who is kinda childish. Actually, she's really smart, and can be mature when she needs to be. It's just that her interests are kinda childish for someone her age.

Penn really likes cartoons and video games, and recently she's been getting into Sonic the Hedgehog. At first I thought she was just getting into the Snapcube fandubs, but out of nowhere I saw her watching one of the new Sonic TV shows, can't remember if it was Sonic Boom or Sonic Prime.

Anyways, at first, this didn't really bother me too much. She watched her show for the weekend, and I would get back to my shows for the next few weeks. But then the next weekend, she was still watching the show. When I asked Penn why, she said that she was really invested, and she hadn't actually finished the show yet. She said she was watching it in increments, because she wanted to savor the episodes, which felt stupid. The writing was obviously meant for kids, and the colors felt really bright and glaring to my eyes. I couldn't believe this was how she was unwinding, or how she could "savor" such a bad show. Plus, I prefer to watch as many episodes as possible in one go rather than in separate goes, but to each their own ig.

Next weekend comes, and guess what? Penn picks up the remote before I can get it, and says she's gonna keep watching some more. At this point, I'm pretty mad. I've been wanting to watch my shows all in one go during the weekends, but have been stuck watching one or two episodes at a time after school each day. So I snapped at her, saying, "Nooo, let's watch my things!"

Penn looked kinda hurt, and when she asked me why I said that in such an annoyed tone, I told her that the show she was watching was cringe and just plain bad. I also said that we never watched my shows anymore, only hers, and that she shouldn't be focusing on kids' media when she has college to focus on soon.

Penn got really mad at me for saying that, telling me that she just wanted to unwind now that the third quarter had ended for her school (our school years are divided into four quarters rather than 2 semesters), and that her homework load was lighter. She also said that she hardly ever uses the TV, and that I wouldn't die if she used it just once. She then left the living room in a huff and went up to her room. This was a day ago, and she hasn't spoken to me since then.

I feel like I was really a justified asshole in this. She's been hogging the TV with the Sonic show, instead of focusing on any of her advanced classes. I guess you guys can decide? It just feels like we're both getting older, and that she needs to stop focusing on such childish things. I think that if I help her get into media that's more aimed for older audiences, it'll help her get into more of a mature mindset.

#aita #am i the asshole

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whumpmasinjuly · 11 months ago

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Now introducing the prompt list for Whumpmas in July 2024!

Thank you for patiently waiting! As a reminder, we will not be reblogging any creations on this blog and will instead keep this blog as a space to only post the prompts, tags, and relevant information. We will post the tag for each day, and we ask that you use two tags when filling prompts this year so that others may find your creations easily: Tag 1 —> #wij24day__ (Fill in the blank with the appropriate day number for the prompt you are filling! For example, if you are doing the prompt for day 21, make sure to tag your post with #wij24day21.)

Tag 2 —> #whumpmasinjuly2024 Be sure to also tag @whumpmasinjuly-archive if you would like your posts reblogged to our new official archive account! Of course, feel free to use any other relevant tags too! You can also find a banner that you can use in your posts (if you want, not required) under the #wijbanner tag.

The prompts are divided into three categories: community (red boxes), question (green boxes), and creation (white boxes). Everyone is free to participate as much or as little as they want–there’s no completionist requirement! This list provides a preview of the prompts, but on each day a more detailed post will be released with more context and additional suggestions for each day’s task. Similar to previous years, all prompts and other important information will be found under the #infowhumpmasinjuly tag and #infowij24 for ease of access. This blog will also use the tags #wijquestion , #wijcommunity , and #wijprompt respectively for each post so that you can filter and find the type of prompts you’d like to do.

Below the cut is a text list of this year’s prompts:

1. (Re)Introduce yourself 2. What are your top three favorite whump tropes? 3. "______ deserved it" 4. Post a whump prompt for someone else to fill on Day 28 5. Share a TV show, movie, or any media that gives you the whumperflies! 6. Left Behind 7. Post a link to your favorite whump fic of all time! 8. Describe your favorite type of whumper 9. Mind Games 10. Check out a new whump blog and drop them an ask 11. What songs/playlists are perfect for whumpy daydreaming? 12. Caught 13. Share some of your favorite niche whump tags! 14. Describe the ideal fic you've always wanted to read, but have yet to find/haven't written yet. 15. A Soft Reprieve 16. Create a whump meme! 17. What has been your most recent whump obsession? 18. "Or else" 19. Create a list of some of your favorite whump blogs to share! 20. What character do you wish to see whumped more in canon/fan-made media? 21. Abandoned 22. Find a story/author you've never engaged with before, and leave some nice comments! 23. What is your favorite type of whump setting? 24. Denial 25. Share a sneak peek of something you're working on 26. Describe your favorite type of whumpee 27. Delirium 28. Fill someone's whump prompt from Day 4 29. When did you get your first whumperflies? 30. "I'm here" 31. Who is someone in the whump-creating world that you admire and why?

#whumpmasinjuly2024 #wij2024 #infowij24 #infowhumpmasinjuly #whumpmasinjuly #whump event #whump community #whump

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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 4 months ago

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Outside the Lines 6

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon, obsessive compulsive behaviour, kidnapping, and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Reader has her routine and her fellow patient gets in the way of those.

Character: Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers, (lumberjack AU)

Note: I am tryn rotate through fics and such. Thanks for all your patience.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

Love you all. Take care. 💖

You put away the last of the dishes. The smell of bacon hangs in the air as your stomach mulches the few bites you managed to swallow. You're trying but it's very hard to get used to it all. Dr. Makira always says change is difficult.

Everything is just new and strange and confusing to you. Not just the walls you don't know but the men within them. You know that Steve is a hero and Bucky too, but you really don't know them.

"Hey, sweetheart," Steve startles you as he enters behind you. "Looks good in here. Good job cleaning up."

"Yes, sir, er, Captain," you correct yourself as you face him, looking down to keep between the borders.

"Bucky just went to go get that label maker so it'll be just me and you for a bit," he nears the island and leans his elbows on it. Even as he curls his shoulders forward, he seems inconquerably large. "Do you want to do something fun?"

"Fun? Oh, do you have books... Captain?" You tug on your ear three times and mouth the last word again.

"Um, maybe later I'll dig some out. I was thinking we could play a game."

"Play a game? Like, er, go fish?" You ask.

"Yeah, how about... battleship?"

"Battleship? I've never played that."

"No? I thought it was really popular," he says. "Guess we can learn together."

"Okay, I can do that, but uh... Captain? Don't I have other chores? Laundry?" You wonder.

"Later," he assures you as he comes around the counter. He offers his hand. "You earned some fun."

"Yes, Captain. I'm trying real hard, don't you know?"

"I know it, sweetheart. I see it." He takes your hand and tugs you across the tile. You teeter and squeal as you arch your feet and walk on your toes to keep from crossing the lines.

He brings you into the front room and points to the couch. You dutifully go ahead and sit in the middle. He goes to the standing cabinet at the wall and opens the doors. He takes out a box and nears. He sits beside you, close enough to touch you.

He lifts the lid off and reveals a cluster of small pegs; red and white. They're all mixed up. It makes you feel itchy. You reach and take a handful and start dividing them by colour. He doesn't stop you.

Instead, he takes out the boards and opens them like cases. There are grids marked with numbers and letters.

"Alright, so, we can't look at each others' boards," he grabs the instruction booklet and scatters the pegs. You continue to sort through them. "Sweetheart, are you listening?"

"Oh, yes, uh..." you keep your handful of pegs and pluck up a cushion, "I'll sit on the floor."

"You don't have to, we can move the chair."

"It's okay," you hurried circle the table and drop the cushion. You sit on your legs and keep sorting the pegs. You don't like that there mixed up.

"So, you put your ships on the board wherever you want. I do the same thing. And then we guess where the other put theirs," he explains. "The red, you use to mark hits on your ships and the white, you mark up on this," he points to the verticle board, "your hits and misses too. The white are misses."

"Hm, okay," you say as you keep the red and white pegs from rolling into each other.

"Here are your ships," he takes out a handful of the little plastic boats.

"Thank you, Captain."

"Good girl," he praises again and you look up at him over your board.

"Am I good?"

"Of course," he smiles.

You take the boats and line them up by size; smallest to biggest across the top row. That's nice and tidy. Steve takes longer to finish his.

He looks up with a pinch between his brows, "you ready?"

You nod.

"You first," he says.

"Me? What do I do?"

"Guess. So you can look at your board and guess where you think I put my ships. So like... E4, and if you hit, I'll tell you. You can put red if you do. If you hit every spot on a ship, then you sunk my battleship."

"Oh, right, right," you say. "Um, er..." you look on the board. "G2?"

He glances down, "miss."

You take a white peg and mark the space. He hums before he makes a guess.

"I9," he says.

"Miss," you chime then check the board, "hmmm, C4."

"Nope," he puts a peg in where he missed. The board looks tiny in his large hands. "B2?"

You shift and check the board, "hit." You pout and takes a red peg. "A8?"

"Miss," he replies. You mark it.

"B3?" He says.

"Hit. Erm, D2?"

"Miss. What about... B1?"

You blink. All your ships are together. Oops.

"Hit."

Your next guess is a miss too. Then he hits. He sinks the smallest ship with A1.

"Oh, I lost a boat," you say.

"It's not over until you lose them all," he says. "How about we add some extra fun?"

"Um, what?" You ask.

"We could make it more interested. How about, each time we sink a ship, we... give the other person a kiss."

You squeak, "what?"

"Yeah, it'll be nice," he goads.

"But... but..." you chew your lip as he stares at your mouth.

"Just a peck, sweetheart," he purrs.

"Mmm, but, mmm, I don't know."

"Come on," he pleads. "It's just a kiss."

"I... I..." you stare at him. It must be a part of the plan. You're not very good at being close to others. Touching is tough but you've been working to move past those things. "Okay."

"So... I sunk your ship," he taunts with a playful tilt of his head.

"Um, right," you push yourself up with the table. You reluctantly traipse around and wring your hands together.

He offers his cheek and taps it. You bend and hover just before it. You quickly peck, his beard tickling you, then retreat, ducking to hide behind the board.

"Oh, your lips are soft," he says.

"Thank you, Captain," your voice comes out in a whisper.

"Your go," he prompts.

"Oh, uh... E9."

"Hit," he says.

"Oh!" you grab a red peg.

"Good job," he returns and gives a thoughtful hum. "Mmmm, C3?"

You mutter, "hit."

"Alright," he comments with a hint of surprise. He probably didn't expect so many together. Did he figure it out?

"E10?"

"Miss. B3?"

You groan. He knows! You could move it. No, you wouldn't be able to do it without moving the whole board.

"You sunk another," you utter.

"Ooh, other cheek?" He wonders hopefully.

Your face is on fire. You stand up and go around the other side of the table. You stare at his flannel shirt. You can't bare to look him in the eye. You bend and plant another kiss, one he leans into until your lips smush on his cheek.

You recoil and once more resume your place on the cushion. He purrs again.

"You're go," he urges.

You guess randomly. You forget to check where you hit. It's another miss. You don't even want to sink his ships. The kissing is too much.

Several back and forths and a third ship goes down. You feel like crying. You didn't really think about the rules before you put the ships on the board. You're so stupid.

"Come here," Steve cooes.

You get up, slouching shyly as you approach. You bend to kiss his cheek but he surprises you as he turns and you meet his lips instead. His hand catches the back of your head before you can react.

He smothers you, locking you in place, and you push on his chest. You whine as his tongue slides over your lips. You don't like that.

He lets you go and you stumble back, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand.

"What's wrong?" He asks.

"Captain, I... I'm not used to it. I never... I'm sorry," you stop and sway on the other side of the table.

"Ah, sweetheart, of course, it's alright. The more you do it, the better it'll be." He coaxes.

"Oh, okay," you get back to your knees. "F9?"

"Shoot! You hit. Sink."

"Huh?" You flinch at the last word, "really?"

"Got the small one," he says as he gets up. "My turn to pay my dues."

"Oh, that's... that's-- You don't have to."

"Fair is fair," he reaches for you, latching onto your upper arm to force you up.

You stand knowing that resistance is not an option. Not only is he stronger, but you want to be good. You want to get better. That's all you've ever wanted.

He guides you to face him and you tremble. It's much more intimidating like this. He cups your chin as he gazes down at you. You gulp.

He bends and your body goes rigid. He tilts your head and presses his mouth to yours. The tip of his tongue flicks along the crease of your lips but he doesn't persist. He parts with a pleased drone.

"See, we both win," he says.

You pull away and sit. Your scalp is on fire. You don't know how much more you can handle. Dr. Makira always said change shouldn't come all at once.

He clears his throat and sits again. He grins over his board before he refocuses. He rubs his chin as his thinks. His blue irises glimmer.

"D1."

Yep. You figured.

"Hit."

It isn't difficult for him to go down the ship. Hit. Hit. Hit.

He wins again.

"Steve-- Captain," you say as fidget. "I don't think-- I can't."

"Aw, sweetheart, you already did it. You're so good."

"But... er, I'm... I don't know."

"Here," he waves you up and shifts over on the couch.

You flick your lashes and stand. You go to him as he extends his arms. He puts his hands on your hips and draws you between his knees.

"I just think you need to slow down. You're not taking your time," he says. "So, just go at your own pace," he brings his hands up to frame your face, pushing your hair back, rubbing your cheekbones with his thumbs. "Alright, I'm yours, sweetheart."

He closes his eyes and puckers expectantly. You stare back. He's being nice, you think. He's not angry. He hasn't hurt you. You'd like to keep it that way.

You gather your courage and lean in. You put your hands on his shoulders and close your eyes just before your lips meet. His beard tickles you again as his hands stretch around your head.

He holds his lips to yours and gently opens his mouth. He pokes with his tongue and you twitch. He keeps you in place. You surrender to his diligent effort and let him in.

He tilts his head as he invades your mouth. You garble around him and clutch the seam of his shirt. You feel his muscles beneath. He's stronger than you, remember that.

When he finally pulls away, you're woozy. He lets his hand fall down your neck and he feels along the top of your dress. As his speaks, his voice scrapes in his throat.

"That wasn't so bad, was it?" He asks.

#bucky barnes #steve rogers #dark steve rogers #dark bucky barnes #dark!steve rogers #dark!bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #steve rogers x reader #marvel #outside the lines #mcu #avengers #captain america #winter soldier #series #fic #dark fic #dark!fic

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